New Moms Drowning in Postpartum Life

“My husband and I welcomed our sweet baby girl a week ago and it has been the best but hardest 8 days of my life. I love her so much and just want to stare at her all day and snuggle her but the lack of sleep and routine is a struggle. She has been cluster feeding since we got home from the hospital and it’s exhausting. She will want to eat every 30 min especially from 11 pm-5 am and is not interested in sleeping. Some days she will eat every 2-3 hours and nap but today for example she fed from 1”

“My son is 13 months and I love him more than anything in the world. Getting home from work, him looking at me and just keeps smiling and saying "dada" is the single best feeling in the world. But my God, I hate the fact he is such a bad sleeper. We had a bit of a rough start since he came four weeks early, needed to stay in the hospital because of low sugarlevels in his blood and finally, him needing to lie under a blue light for a week. In the first two weeks, we went to the hospital”

“I am 13 days postpartum, any tips on dealing with the sunset doom? I love my baby so so much and we are both completely safe but when the sun goes down it's like a switch in my mind and everything feels overwhelming even though nothing has changed. I dread the sun going down even though my baby, truthfully, is a very easy baby at night right now and I am getting "enough" sleep. There is just something devastating about it being night. Can anyone relate to this and any tips to make”

“Seriously how do you get anything done? I have a 6 week old, and between nursing her which takes about 15-25 minutes, getting her to sleep so she’s not overtired (she has serious FOMO), waking her up (we’re capping her daytime naps since her nights and days have been turned around) changing diapers, etc. I feel like I can’t do anything around the house. She still eats every 2-3 hours (she’s past her birth weight so I haven’t been waking her up to do so, that’s just when she’s hungry). We have a”

“FTM and I’ve been trying (and failing at) moms on call since my LO was 2 weeks old. He’s 5 weeks today and yesterday somewhat said eff it to the schedule and it felt so freeing. One of things I do want to keep is a bedtime routine just for some consistency but does anyone have thoughts on forcing a baby awake at the 2 hour nap mark? Baby typically takes shorter naps but he’s been napping now for almost 2.5 hours and I feel as though I should lean into his cues and routine vs what I’m trying to f”

“I don’t really know how to write this without making it incredibly long, because there are so many pieces to it. I’m 11 days postpartum with my first baby, and even though I love my baby and I’m grateful she’s here, I am incredibly unhappy. I feel like I’m drowning emotionally. The biggest thing consuming me is my husband. When we first got together, he was incredibly affectionate with me. He would hold me, kiss me, make me feel wanted, and I felt deeply loved by him. Somewhere along the way tha”

“Every month it’s something new and challenging and I can’t seem to figure it out. I look around me and this baby is eating solids great, this baby is doing long stretches of sleep at night, this baby can be soothed by this specific thing, this baby that, etc. I feel like I just cannot figure out my baby. I don’t know how to do so much. The crazy thing is… I worked in childcare for 9 years working specifically with babies and toddlers (more babies than toddlers) and my own baby is making me feel”

“Just coming on here to say this is finally it. My 3 month old is finally sleeping through the night without needing to be fed! Yesterday it happened and it felt so amazing I had to make sure it wasn’t a fluke. It’s not I’m so happy. Me on the other hand still waking up lol still having to give her her paci if she starts getting fussy for it. Still having to pump a little bit to get through her night. 🫠 But got her from 9:30-9 the last two days it’s awesome. submitted by /u/BlockTypi”

“My baby girl is 6 months next week and I can officially say I have not slept more that 2/3 hours straight for the last 6 months😭 I feel like I am going to collapse and definitely past burnout. My baby hardly sleeps in the day - I try my best to get her to sleep but staying asleep is a different story. She probably sleeps a total of an hour in the day. At night she is waking every 45 mins to an hour. I write this post now at 3,14am while she’s sleeping in my arms as she keeps screaming every tim”

“Currently expecting my second child and adamant about making changes this time to have a better postpartum period than I had with my first. One huge difference is that my husband will be here and on paternity leave; we are a military family and he was unfortunately gone quite a bit in my son’s first year. It was Covid, we were not stationed near family, and my sleep deprivation was unreal. I am so happy my husband will be here to share in nighttime care this time. Asking for advice from those wh”

“Just looking for some new ideas. I have a very active, very mobile, very high emotion and energy 12 month old. I use the phrase “all gas and no breaks” to describe him a lot lol. Anyways, sleep has been pretty poor lately. I woke up feeling exhausted and am just like “what are we going to do all day?”. Since having a mini me watching me all the time, I have become hyper aware of how much im on my phone. Pre-kid I would just lay on the couch and scroll and watch TV on a day like today. But I dont”

“I have a 14 week old baby and she does about 7-8 hour stretches at night. She has been doing this for about 3-4 weeks maybe. But, my mom brain automatically wakes up at night after 4-5 hours of consecutive sleep even though baby is peacefully sleeping. When will I be able to sleep 7-8 hours consistently again? It's 4 am as we speak and I've been up since 2:30 am. Baby is fast asleep and won't wake until 5 am. I'm really miserable over sleeping in intervals! submitted by &#3”

“First time mom. I have a 6 week old newborn and it’s been very exhausting. I’m very thankful that I am a stay at home mom, and I’ve gained so much respect for mothers who go back to work. I feel like a lazy failure right now. I hate when the house is a mess, but I feel like an awful mess right now. We live in a 900 sqft house that gets cluttered to easily. We’re moving this winter, but in the meantime, there’s laundry everywhere. Dishes piled up. I tell myself that I will do one task a day to he”

“So I already struggled with insomnia in the past and anxiety but I don’t feel like I’m having anxiety at all that’s keeping me up it’s just the fact I love my babies so much. I have 7wk (8wk tmrw) old twins and i love them so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so much it’s keeping me awake and I keep randomly crying and have the constant want to hold them but have to leave them alone to sleep so I don’t disturb them n it’s driving my crazy so now I’m just laying on the f”

“Am I okay? No, of course not!! I am spiraling. Last night, after my husband and I said good night, I shut my eyes and imagined what dropoff would be like. I couldn’t sleep for another hour after I had imagined my baby having a meltdown. I know he’s going to have so much fun at daycare and I’m going to enjoy some of the freedom I get back. But my anxiety is eating me away… Hope to go back to this post after Day 1 and maybe when we have both settled into our new routine. What should I do on week 1”

“Need some reassurance/advice as a first time mom. I have been on nights for 1.5 years now and have always struggled with sleep, especially since I switch to normal people hours when I’m off. I will have to work full time night shift for ~2 months while my husband works a typical 9-5 M-F. I’m currently on maternity leave and will return when my baby is 3 months old. My sister will be here to help watch him, which should help me get sleep during the day in between shifts; however, I am still going”

“Brand new baby overnight My 5 week old seems to have done a complete 180. The first 4 weeks, I’d say she was just about like any other newborn. Then about 3 or 4 days ago she began fighting every nap throughout the day. We would sooth her in every way we could just for her to doze off just to wake up screaming 2-3 minutes later. This cycle would repeat for a couple hours. She would literally be awake from the time she woke up for the day(8am ish) until about 3pm we would finally after multiple a”

“FTM to an almost 5 month old and currently on parental leave. Most of my days are pretty much the same thing on repeat, baby is with me for the vast majority of the day while my husband is busy with work. Before having my baby, I had never used Vinted. Now, I’d say about 90% of the baby stuff I buy comes from there, and I’ve also started selling things we no longer need. And honestly, without even getting into the economics of it, Vinted has unexpectedly become this little outlet for me. I somet”

“My baby was almost always a great sleeper, slept all night only waking to feed then instantly back to sleep. Then 13 months came and it’s like everything changed. She’s been on a consistent schedule since she was a newborn only slightly shifting as her sleep needs shifted, I’m talking always falling asleep exactly when I expected to everyday. She had been transitioned to 1 nap since around 12 months, and it’s been perfect till last month. First it started with her waking around midnight, taking”

“I feel like an awful mother to my almost 4 week old. I didn’t know that newborns slept in an active sleep cycle so I’ve been using those cues to feed him. So he’s been getting 8-10 feeding sessions a day! submitted by /u/No-Description4151 [link] [comments]”

“3 week old newborn mama here. She’s hardly sleeping, she’ll sleep for maybe 19 minutes on her back in her bassinet with safe sleep standards and that’s it. she’ll wake up and start screaming crying. i can burp her for 2 minutes or burp her for 30, doesn’t matter, do the spinny burping trick (iykyk) she’s still thrashing around crying and grunting. gas drops don’t help either. we’re both tired. idk what else to do. she hardly sleeping at all due to her discomfort, i hold her up after feeds, burp”

“I know all the tips and tricks at this point. None of them are working and as a second time mom I know it just takes time sometimes, she’s only six weeks. And I think she has silent reflux. But man, I am exhausted. I have not slept for more than an hour and a half since we have been home from the hospital. I have no help. My husband helps where he is able but he is exhausted too and since I am breastfeeding, there is only so much he can (or is willing) to do. In the past two weeks alone we have”

“I have a 3.5 month old going through the sleep regression currently. I’ve been away all week and sharing a room with my husband so we couldn’t take shifts, and at one point, baby was waking up every 40 minutes. I probably haven’t had more than 3-4 hours of broken sleep each night all week! But I was still up and out walking, spending time with family etc. Once we got home and we could take shifts I slept 7 hours straight for one single night and actually felt on top of the world! If I had slept”

“My LO is 22 months old. We are moving into a new house tomorrow after staying with family for 2 months AND my first nights away from my co-sleeping, nursing LO will be in 2 weeks. I thought we’d be in our house at least a month ago, so I’m a little panicked that this is all now happening in the span of 2 weeks. Currently, LO nurses to sleep, I lay her in her bed (in a room we share, been this way since she was 4 months old), and she usually wakes up 2-3 hours after that. Then she nurses back to”

“Hi, I feel like this should be the best time of my life but instead I’m left constantly crying and filled with anxiety, especially at night. I’m a week postpartum and I feel like I can’t even enjoy her being around. I feel so guilty. I’m constantly mourning my life before and having a hard time accepting my new normal. I love her obviously, but I have a sort of what have I done feeling. I feel so horrible about it. Makes me want to throw up. I want to enjoy this time so bad. submitted by &”

“I EP but I still feel like this group could help with sharing experiences on this. I’m 8.5 months pp and baby sleeps like a dream so I can’t even say I’m sleep deprived. I’m obsessed with my baby and none of this is directed at her. But I’m just so angry and irritable all the time. Like everyone else drives me crazy and makes me so mad. I feel like all I do is complain and I can’t stop. My husband says it seems like I ENJOY being miserable and I think he’s right. I’m in therapy for a history of”

“I am officially past my due date and I've been dealing with insomnia for the last five weeks, give or take. I want to say it started when she went head down at 35 weeks. Some nights I was still able to sleep at night, while other nights I was just awake as hard as I tried. I took Unisom, only worked a couple of times. Now I just accept my fate until I give birth. The thing is, i LOVED being up early in the morning. I felt most productive and less like a lazy bum. My husband works Graves and”

“I’m three weeks postpartum and exclusively breastfeeding. I’m learning how to sleep when the baby sleeps but my husband and my mom take shifts, especially at night so I’m never alone when feeding him. During the day, if I’m having a hard time soothing my baby, my mom takes over so LO can sleep. It’s hard to say no when my mom offers to take over so I can sleep/rest. With night feeds, I hand the baby off to my husband or mom right after he’s done so I can sleep. I can’t help but feel like I am re”

“my baby is 3 months old and i'm exhausted. i don't even feel like im in my own body if that makes sense, just auto pilot. everything aches and hurts, im exhausted by 5pm and then whenever baby is asleep i struggle to fall asleep. i secretly miss having a few drinks and just silencing my screaming mind and body. 3 months has felt like a lifetime. does it ever get better? i hate my body and my partner. i dread everyday. i love her so much but i think i hate being a mum. submitted by”

“Third baby, 5 days old. I really do love snuggling my newborn, and I know I’ll miss it and it’ll all pass. His favorite time to snuggle now is of course 1-4am, I put him down in his crib and he’s up crying within a few minutes. I just want a little sleep lol I know people mean well when they tell me to just enjoy all the snuggles, but it’s also kind of dangerous when I’m borderline falling asleep with him in my arms and can’t put him down! Just a vent. My second child is 5 now so it’s been awhil”

“I’ve seen so many women on social media talking about how the exhaustion they experienced while pregnant was worse than it is post baby. Respectfully, WTF?? Sure, by the end of my pregnancy, waking up 3x a night to pee sucked but I was definitely wayyyy more rested than I am now (three and a half weeks postpartum). To me, the two phases don’t even seem comparable. Am I alone in this? submitted by /u/Sasha00007 [link] [comments]”

“My baby just turned four months old and I find myself so frustrated and defeated by the end of every day because he won’t take his last nap of the day. I feel so bad that he’s so over tired but bedtime and he’s screaming but I don’t know what else to do. This has been going on for the last two months ever since we started doing an earlier bedtime. We’re usually up at 6:45am, bottle, play and sleep at 8:15. Then 2- 1.45 hour nap, then we do it all over again. 90 minutes wake windows and two hour”

“I’m still so tired. I have only nursed baby never pumped. Didn’t want to make more milk than I have to. I’m so tired. Only one wake up a night. I eat as healthy as one could be, high enough calories, workout 4-5 times a week. Try to sleep as much as I can. Starting to lose hope that I’ll feel better again. Maybe when I wean? submitted by /u/ComprehensiveWeb480 [link] [comments]”

“hi everyone. when i first brought my baby home, i was obsessively googling wake windows, sleep associations, and the dreaded "drowsy but awake" rule. it gave me so much unnecessary anxiety. if u are currently trapped under a sleeping baby and stressing because u didn't put them in the bassinet, please read this. here is what i learned after letting go of the internet's "rules": contact napping is biologically normal: u are not creating a "bad habit" by holdi”

“So I’m 9 weeks postpartum and the most weirdest embarrassing thing happened to me last night. It was a rough evening and night with the LO so when she finally went to sleep I wanted to go to bed also and not move a muscle so she doesn’t wake up (we co-sleep). However I sort of needed to go pee but thought I could wait until a few hours until I needed to pump. Well 3 hours later I wake up to my pants soaking wet… I didn’t even tell my husband cause I was embarrassed. Crazy thing.. I still really”

“It’s 3am. My baby has been awake for 2hours and just won’t sleep. Nothing works. I’m so tired. She is 8.5mo and has had a lot of developmental progress recently so maybe that’s it. But wow. I’m so tired of being absolutely exhausted and sleep deprived. I didn’t think I’d still be going through such atrocious stints of no sleep at this point. submitted by /u/No_Tart_4311 [link] [comments]”

“how are you guys getting any time to yourselves? I genuinely need ideas because I feel like I’m losing myself a little bit. My baby is 10 weeks old. My husband works roughly 6:30am–5:30pm and is starting classes again next week, so when he gets home he still has schoolwork to do. He also tries to get a walk in every day for his physical/mental health and needs to be in bed around 8–9pm because of his work schedule. I’m home with our baby all day, and lately I’ve been feeling increasingly depress”

“I am 6 weeks postpartum FTM. Exclusively breastfeeding and a SAHM for background. In the morning and early afternoon I feel like the perfect person. I feel good about things, not overwhelmed, etc. The second 4 or 5 pm hits I feel like crap and I seem to find anything to rage at my husband. I have said more hurtful things to him in those hours since I've been postpartum than I have our entire 5 year relationship. I don't know why I shift like that at night. I just get so overwhelmed and e”

“Hi, I had a c section birth on Friday and came home from the hospital on Monday. I got some chunks of sleep in the hospital but since coming home I have had terrible insomnia. I’ve gotten little to no sleep the last three nights - the closest I come are these dream-like hallucinations where I’m half awake and then wake up quickly. I feel like there is adrenaline pumping through my veins, and I’m so tired but so wired. I don’t have anxiety about baby per se and I have a ton of support, but I migh”

“6 weeks postpartum and my recovery has been very long and painful. I usually take the night shifts while my husband sleeps. Recently, LO has been inconsolable for several hours during the night, only falling asleep for 5-10 minutes before waking up again. As I’m still healing, the intensity of caring for her is quite difficult. I’m trying to gauge when I should ask for help, even if it’s just for 30 minutes, or should I hold out all night? I feel guilty for interrupting his sleep when he and my”

“My baby had some really bad nights between weeks 10–12. We were sometimes up every hour, or she would wake around 1 AM and then only sleep for 10–20–30 minutes at a time for the rest of the night. It was brutal. I know 10–12 weeks is considered quite early for the “big” 4-month sleep regression, so I’m wondering what to expect from here. After week 12, things got better overall, but we still have some really difficult nights with frequent wakings. Daytime sleep is also hard. She often needs to b”

“I frankly feel like I am rotting away from the inside out. My 8 week old has always slept terribly but at least I had a secret key to nurse him to sleep… except that’s not working any more. He’s been awake for 5 hours and I’ve spent the last 3 trying to do everything to get him to sleep. Shush/swaddle/sway/white noise/giant bottle of milk, burp, clean diaper, blackout curtains, bouncing on a yoga ball. I’ve done it all. He also hardly sleeps. At best I can get about 7 hours out of him overnight”

“I thought I’d be so past the point of needing to make a post like this at 10 months. We’ve sleep trained several times and it never sticks, and it gets harder on my heart each time. We’ve given sleep training a break for 2-3 months now, and I’ve been rocking my daughter to sleep. Since she was a newborn, she’s had false starts. Lately it’s been more. I’m writing this from the rocking chair as I rock her back to sleep for the second time tonight within an hour. It’s been 10 months of horribly bro”

“Hi there, FTM here with a 9.5 month old EBF Velcro baby girl. I am a stay at home mom, and I’m absolutely loving motherhood! I haven’t slept much since my daughter’s birth, my hair is always a mess, and I have no social life, but it’s alright with me because I feel so lucky to be able to raise my daughter 100% of the time during her early years. Anyway, that being said, she has been high energy and glued to her mommy since she was conceived. While almost always happy, she does not sit still, exc”

“I’m honestly at my wits’ end with my 7-month-old’s sleep and would really appreciate some advice. I’m exhausted from constantly calculating wake windows, nap lengths and bedtime, and I feel like I can’t make plans or go anywhere because his naps are so inconsistent. He used to be on 3 naps with roughly 2.5 / 2.5 / 2.5 / 3 wake windows, but lately he has started refusing the third nap, and I’m wondering if he’s ready for 2 naps. The confusing thing is that his daytime sleep varies massively. Some”

“When did it start, when did it end, what happened in between? My baby slept like a dream (night was 7hr stretch, 3hr stretch, 1hr and then up for the day) until he hit 12 weeks and then it gradually fell apart. He started only doing a 3hr stretch and then waking every hour after that. Transfers became a nightmare. Every nap has to be a contact nap now. At 15.5 weeks now, we’re able to get a 4 or 5 hour stretch followed by wakes every 1.5 to 2 hours. Transfers are slightly easier at night. But st”

“My LO went through the 6mos regression for multiple weeks! He’d wake up every hour or two throughout the night and would wake up grumpy. It was hard for all of us, and we couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. Then last night….something magical ✨ happened. He slept from 10-6am without waking up once! Hopefully this is the turnaround! 🤞🏻 submitted by /u/fluffypanda815 [link] [comments]”

“I’m totally at a loss with my 8mo’s sleep. It’s always been terrible but just keeps getting worse month on month. Her day as follows: Awake 6 Nap 8.30-10 Nap 12.30-13.30 Nap 16.30-17.00 Bed 20.00 Overnight she wakes 3/4 times and will only feed back to sleep. She needs rocking to sleep for the first stretch of sleep. She then wakes every morning at 4.30/5 and needs holding til 6am. We’ve tried moving bedtime earlier and later. Tried dropping a nap. Tried modified Ferber and a little CIO and noth”

“Hi- my baby is 7 months and she’s growing so fast and is so active which is really fun but i find my self like hard core grieving the 3 month to 6 month window? When she was just a sweet potato? Like obviously those were hard and i barely slept but now i just feel like time is a thief and its only going to get more complicated from here. Not trying to be negative, i just wonder if others feel this way? If it’s hormonal or im alone here. submitted by /u/Successful_Ad_9212 [link]”

“Anyone else experiencing this? My baby is 4 months old and she’s more aware and has short naps now, but she can’t do much still as far as playing. I really try my best to not use my phone around her or watch tv. But it’s honestly really exhausting mentally to constantly just come up with things to talk about with her while watching her swing at her toys. It’s like the only break I can get from that is if I have her watch me do chores, which isn’t a break either. Idk. I just wish I could go on my”

“I am 4 months postpartum with my first and it has hit me like a truck. My baby is really reliant on me for contact sleep. She will not go into the crib for naps and will only stay in the crib about half the night before she demands to be picked up and held until morning (anywhere between 1am on a bad night and 4am on a good night). This has taken a really big toll on my mental health and I feel like I am running out of steam. I am all over the place hormonally, my hair is falling out in handfuls”

“Has anyone had success fixing their insomnia? It’s not anxiety related at all. I feel great. Baby sleeps through the night 11pm-9am. I just can’t fall asleep until 3/4 am no matter what I do. I tried melatonin and unisom with no luck. It just made me groggy in the morning. Even with falling asleep I still wake up around 7 and just lay in bed hoping I’ll fall back asleep. I’ve read about different blood tests etc but I just don’t know what to do. I take iron supplements already and still take pre”

“4 month sleep regression. It’s upon us. My lovely baby who used to sleep all night from 6 weeks old (I was blessed the second time around after a horrid first child) now no longer sleeps through the night and better yet wants to have full conversations and touch my face all the time. I should slept when the baby slept like they all told me. I regret it now hahah submitted by /u/jinxix2395 [link] [comments]”

“My LO was a wonderful nighttime sleeper from day 1, and as soon as she reached birthweight and no longer needed to be woken up for feeds, began having 4 to 7 hour stretches before waking us up, and was extremely easy to put back down for another long stretch. Well, she is 16 weeks on Thursday and the regression has already begun and is now constantly waking up and needing to be comforted back down. She is still feeding the same amount at night, about 2 feeds per night, but is waking up very freq”

“I’m looking for some real-life experiences from mums who have been in a similar situation because I’m honestly exhausted and would love to hear how other people actually manage this. I have a 7-month-old baby and my husband is going to be away for work for extended periods, so for months at a time I’ll essentially be doing the majority of the childcare 24/7. We don’t have family nearby or a regular “village” to help. My baby is at that age where he is becoming VERY active — crawling/trying to st”

“i feel so much mom guilt even typing this. im 6 weeks pp and completely overwhelmed. between the extreme sleep deprivation, the physical pain of recovery/feeding, and just not understanding what my baby wants when he screams... im losing it. im constantly terrified about his health/breathing so i never fully relax. my husband and i are like distant roommates who just bicker over chores now. i miss my old life and freedom so much. for those who felt this deep regret and anxiety in the beginning,”

“please tell me the 3am fights stop eventually. we have a 6 wk old and im ebf. im in so much physical pain and basically running on 2 hours of sleep. my husband sleeps right through the crying and when i ask for help he acts clueless. i feel like im doing 95% of the mental and physical work. im too anxious to sleep anyway cause im constantly checking if baby is breathing, plus the baby has terrible gas so im always trying to soothe him while hubby snores. did anyone else's marriage take a mas”

“By 2 am i am so exhausted from cluster feeding and rocking that the last thing i want is to climb into a bed that feels clammy. We used to just use old cotton sheets until everything got stained and worn out ,decided to splurge on soft bamboo sheets for everyday use because i needed something to feel nice during sleep deprivation got a 100% Rayon Derived from Bamboo Sheet set so i could throw them in the wash constantly without them turning scratchy. Why did nobody warn me that good bedding beco”

“Is there a 4 week sleep regression or is my baby just doing baby things? She had consistently been doing 2-3 hour stretches through the night. Now, she has one two hour stretch and then will not sleep more than 45 mins after that at a time. submitted by /u/Relevant_Lynx_5117 [link] [comments]”