Moms Fear Losing Support After Birth

“Not sure exactly what i’m looking for maybe just a vent to people that will probably understand. Please be kind I really don’t need judgement right now, i’m feeling more at peace but still feel guilty today. My baby is 4 weeks old, I couldn’t breastfeed with my first barely at all I did it for a month but he still was not up to birth weight had a severe CMPA, Colic, Reflux it was bad a the most traumatic newborn experience you can have screaming 12+ hours a day until we finally tried Nutramigen.”

“Hi everyone this is my first time posting in here and I love the immense support and love in this sub! I’m hoping I can get some support because I feel a bit alone 🥺 I just had my first baby on June 22nd and we are in love. For the most part he’s a great baby, cries when he needs something. He has gas issues but nothing out of the norm. At night he wakes up 3-5 times, I feed, change when needed, and he goes right back to bed which I’m grateful for. Me and my husband had such a good routine, I w”

“Maybe this is controversial, I have no idea. I’m sure there will be a number of comments telling me I’m insecure and overthinking things, because it’s Reddit haha. But other moms: do you y’all ever feel totally dismissed as it pertains to your relationship or attachment with your baby? Today my sitter came by and my two year old really protested her. He was clinging to me a lot, crying hard, rejecting her and it was just overall a tough separation. I’m 7 months pregnant and he’s been very attach”

“Hi, new to Reddit but I need some advice. I (30F) am 20 weeks pregnant. My husband and I have been married for 4 years and are so excited to be pregnant. For some context, I had a stillbirth 2 years ago at 22 weeks and I almost lost my life. It was and still is a very traumatic experience. Needless to say this pregnancy has been beautiful and hard all together. While I am so grateful to be pregnant again with what we know as a normal healthy baby my emotions have been somewhat reserved and I’ve”

“My mom passed away tragically over the weekend. I have been going through the wringer with my emotions and have tried to keep up with drinking water but my supply has drastically dipped. Eating has been hard. Is there anything I can do to help my supply right now as my 8 month old has been getting so frustrated on the boob and I’m not making enough to pump for daycare bottles. submitted by /u/nneessaa22 [link] [comments]”

“My mom came to help with baby for three weeks after the birth and ever since then she’s been acting so weird. She takes everything personally and it’s all about her. Baby is two months now and she’s complaining that she never hears from me. I’m like come on lady I barely have time to shower so you’re lucky if I remember to send you a photograph here and there. I don’t know what to do about her. I don’t really feel like I need to be managing her emotions when I have so much else going on. I’ll be”

“This is my first baby so it’s all new! I want my mom present during the labor but I’m not sure I want her there or not for the actual birth/moments immediately following. I’m more thinking about having that special moment be just between my husband, myself and our new baby once she enters the world. If I were to have my mom stay in the room though, at what point would she leave after the baby is born? Do I have to tell her to leave or how does that work exactly? submitted by /u/Munda”

“i’m currently 1 week and 1 day postpartum and i can’t stop thinking about my midwives especially the one who delivered my baby. i miss them all so much. all my crying this past week has pretty much been about them. has anyone else experienced this, is it normal?? submitted by /u/samii1122 [link] [comments]”

“Hey guys! This is just something i want to rant about, so no need to read it if you don't want to! I'm 37 weeks pregnant with my first! I've decided that when I give birth, I don't want anyone in the room with me other than my fiance! When I told my mom this yesterday, she was upset. My grandmother was there when I said this news, and she told me I need my mom there. I told them both that I just dont want anyone there. I personally don't want anyone there other than my fiance”

“Postpartum. And really felt isolated. Needed my mom and my sister. They really weren’t there for me. And did not spend much time at all with the baby. I called/texted often and they rarely answered the phone. I then realized I was the main one keeping the group chat alive. So I withdrew. It eventually became a huge argument. They defended themselves as to why they weren’t there. I look at our relationship so differently now. But during this time of isolation and crisis when I asked for unbiased”

“My sister is having her first baby soon. I live pretty far from her so I can't be there for her the way that I want to. I plan to make time to go there every once in while to babysit so she and her husband can have a break and/or invite them to my home and watch my niece while they go to the beach or explore the area. In the meantime, I want to get her something to promote self-care in the early stages of motherhood. I was dealing with PPD and operating on autopilot after both my pregnancies”

submitted by /u/Ok_Brilliant_6279 [link] [comments]

“I had a feeling this would happen but it doesn’t make the disappointment hurt any less. I’m a FTM at 31 y.o. and I’m 30w today. Last year I moved from my hometown in KY to IL to live with my partner. To our surprise and blessing, I became pregnant a few months later. My pregnancy has been relatively smooth despite being high risk. This past week I’ve been anxious due to finding out that my little guy is measuring small and I’m now positive for placenta resistance. However, I’m being monitored cl”

“Hi. Not sure what I am looking for... perhaps advice or encouragement. I always wanted to breastfeed my baby but from the start there was not much professional support. Hospital don't really call upon me to breastfeed right after birth (only once a day). And then, when I went to the post partum center, the center director (who seems to be a lactation consultant - she gave my boobs the full massage and pull etc to allow breastmilk to flow better) gave me a schedule to pump every 5h. But no fo”

“Hi everyone! I’m a first-time mom, 8 days postpartum, and I’ve really been struggling mentally with postpartum in general, but especially with breastfeeding. I’ve cried every single day since coming home from the hospital, and I’m honestly having a really hard time finding my footing. At first, I was waking every 2–3 hours to breastfeed, but every session was so unpredictable. Sometimes she would nurse for 15 minutes, and other times it could last an hour and a half. We started supplementing wit”

“I’ve always been an active person and I’ve just gotten cleared by my physio to go to the gym. I’m ready to go but I have a 7 week old and I don’t have anyone to watch her. I also need to shower. ATM I just put her in a bouncer whilst I shower lol but I never have time to wash my hair so I just go to the salon (I’m blessed it’s only $35 at my local place 😭😂) Everything else I just somehow manage submitted by /u/kna101 [link] [comments]”

“To the moms who had close relatives or anyone other than your support person staying at your home after you brought baby home from hospital: was it actually helpful/useful? Either way, how long did they stay? And when? Before birth or after the birth? If they were helpful, what exactly did they do to help? I’m reconsidering not having any visitors right when I bring baby home from the hospital. I would like at least the first week to bond, exhausted and all if that’s the case. But I can also man”

“I'm due with my 2nd kid in a couple months and my husband and I are trying to sort out childcare logistics. Unfortunately, there's only one grandparent who is a regular presence... And she booked a trip around my due date. I suspect I'll be induced early, so it might be fine, but we need a back up plan (which is okay,I have a sibling nearby). It's just... Depressing. We rent part of the old family house from my parents, and they have an apartment on one of the levels as a part-ti”

“In less than 25 minutes I'm heading to the hospital for my induction. I'm trying not to bawl my eyes out because I'm not ready to be away from my first born for this long and it's stressing me out. submitted by /u/TheTaikatalvi [link] [comments]”

“FTM. 37+6. Baby is coming soon via scheduled c-section. I cut off my mom 2 weeks ago. AIO? Some of the reasons I cut her off: -She threw the baby shower. I told her I was not inviting my sister, who I have been no contact with for over 2 years due to her addiction issues, among other things. Mom tried to tell me that this sister was being invited to the shower whether I liked it or not, because she was paying. I told her she’s more than welcome to invite her, but then I wouldn’t be attending. Sh”

“Hey , i’m a first time mom (25) i’ve been feeling super alone and nearly depressed . i’m currently 19 weeks pregnant, and somehow i feel like i‘m alone in a room full of people if that makes sense. Ever since i became pregnant my mom side of the family in specific has treated me very differently . my mom went out of her way to ask people to adopt my child and my sister up till i was 16 weeks talked down on me for being pregnant and always mentioned abortion. which hurt me in ways i’ve never been”

“Hi all, Due to some unforeseen circumstances, we are now looking at the possibility of having our first child born with just the two of us (husband, wife) to take care of everything. We will not be able to receive any support from our parents or siblings (ie they will physically not be present in our city during birth and first few months). For people who have managed something similar, how challenging was it? Is it a good idea to hire nanny/cook or any other kind of help for the first”

“hello mamas, I’m planning for postpartum of baby #2, I also have a little one who will be almost 4yo by the time I give birth. I am an expat, have no family around and it looks like I will have only my husband to help me and look after our little one. I will also have a postpartum doula for 2 visits only, in the first week. I am looking for tips to make this time less stressful and painful, with little support. Should I invest in a chest freezer and prep family meals ahead? how long after birth”

“Hello! Let me just start my saying that I am soooo very grateful that my mom is able to watch my 7 month old while me and my husband work but is it wrong to feel a tinge of jealously as well?? I just want to know that I’m not alone in feeling this lol. She watches him every day and sometimes she comes to my house early and is there when he wakes up, which makes me so sad that sometimes she’s the first thing he sees when he wakes up, only because I want it to be me. I’m so scared he’s going to wa”

“I cry every time I think about my baby growing up and I’m not historically a crier so this has been something else. We did her “first meal” today. Just some bell pepper, ham and cucumber. She immediately grabbed the bell pepper, stuck it in her mouth and started gnawing. I was so shocked. (We’ve been doing the paci teethers with frozen milk to start then pureed fruit and veggies so that’s where she got the coordination.) I still didn’t expect her to catch on so quickly though. She turns 6mo on F”

“I’m not sure if this is the right flaire, so please let me know if I should change it. I wanted to talk about friendships after having a baby. When I got pregnant, everyone around me was so excited about the baby, but almost no one really asked how I was doing. I thought maybe I was just being hormonal and overly sensitive. Then I gave birth, everyone came to celebrate and meet the baby, and that was kind of it. It’s been five months now, and there are only two girlfriends who sporadically check”

“No idea which flair I should’ve used for this… Anyway, looking to see if I’m the AH for expecting more of my visiting mom. For context, my mom was scheduled to come out week 3 of baby being home to visit and help us as people help new parents. I called her out a week early because we weren’t sleeping, eating, or anything. My emotions were all over the place too, so I felt I just needed her sooner to help us out - cook, clean, help with baby as needed, etc. She’s staying for a month and half whil”

“due in a few weeks and wondering what was the hardest change going from 1 to 2 on your postpartum recovery? what did you do or wish you did prior to birth #2? submitted by /u/SweetDetail4627 [link] [comments]”

“I honestly don’t think I’m looking for advice. I think I just want other moms to commiserate with me, tell me their stories, relate to this, and make me feel a little less alone in it. My best friends and I have always been more than just friends. We’ve spent holidays together, gone to each other’s family Thanksgivings, taken vacations together: our lives have always been really intertwined, and I think because of that, the expectations in our friendships have always been high. I started noticin”

“I had my baby 18 days ago after a complicated pregnancy (cervical insufficiency needing a cerclage and gestational diabetes). I had to be on bed rest for about 2 months just hoping my baby wouldn’t arrive too early. Luckily she came at 36 weeks with no NICU time. Things have been great as I have an extremely supportive husband (together for 12 years) who is also on leave for several weeks. He does all of the cooking and half of the cleaning. We eat pretty good for parents of a newborn- homemade”

“I (25F and 37 weeks pregnant) am due at the end of this month. For some context, my parents' current house is a disaster. Growing up, my parents were always working. After my sister (28F) was diagnosed with a chronic illness, they spent most of their time trying to get out of medical debt. My siblings (28F, 22M, 15M) were never the type to help around the house - not cleaning up after their animals, not cleaning shared spaces/bedrooms, or after themselves. If there was an issue, they never m”

“FTM here with my 16mo. I’ve spent so much time on Reddit reading about every stage before we reach it. I always feel like I need to be prepared for the next possible problem. Not long ago, I was still worrying about whether the crib transition would go smoothly. I had been mentally preparing myself for crying, repeated wake-ups, and a long adjustment period. We had also been slowly decorating the nursery, although for months it was mostly being used as storage for the stroller, high chair, toys,”

“I know I’m not the first person to make a post like this, and for the record I do see a therapist that I absolutely love. I just need to shout into the void. I gave birth to my baby a week ago and feel so alone in my grief, even though my husband has been incredibly supportive. I absolutely love my baby. I spend every waking moment staring at her, taking her in, cuddling with her, loving her. When I was pregnant I was so anxious that I made the wrong decision about having kids, but as soon as I”

“Hi! I want others input on this please. For context, my mother and I have a bit of an estranged relationship. She's heavily influenced by the people in her life (specifically my older sister and her friend hosting this baby shower for her daughter). What I mean by this is she will talk to me about something, her opinion on something or take on something, but later one would talk to me again later that day and completely have a different stand. And that is because she spoke to my sister and s”

“Hi all, I'm wondering if anyone else has experienced this and has any words of wisdom or advice on how to cope with this without losing my friend. I moved to a new area with my partner last year and got pregnant. Since we were somewhere new I didn't have any friends in the area and I found a really lovely women on the peanut app when I was a few months pregnant and we were due at the same time. We bonded over the course of our pregnancy and I'd consider her a really good friend now.”

“I know the more I leave it off the worst it's going to get. Ever since I had my first, she's been really happy and loving with her grandchild, but then would tell me something along the lines of "Remember, this is going to be your last child. Don't have another one and get birth control. It's a burden to have kids" and so on with my second child she would say it again. It's not like we're struggling financially, we're comfortable where we're at, even if”

“Prefacing this with I am stressssed about this. My parents will be watching her and I’m so nervous. Mom’s a nurse, everything will probably be fine but I have anxiety. I want to keep up my supply. I pump at least 2x a day once in the morning once at night. Now that I’m back at work I add in another pump or two through the day on the days I work. My LO sleeps through the night so I don’t pump the overnight anymore. How often will I need to pump to keep up my supply? Is it really at risk? I’ll be”

“Hi all! New here. 3rd time mama here but my first girl & first newborn in 8 years 😭 feels so surreal and scary starting all over again like this.. just wanted to share some things before asking if this is cluster feeding or if I should be concerned in your guys’ opinions. My baby girl is 9 days old & has been lovelyyyyy about sleeping and keep to a schedule!! Until last night 😵‍💫 normally miss girl wakes up every 3 hours and eats 2 oz. We were having some trouble with milk supply and”

“Even as I write the subject line, I feel like I'm not even describing it correctly 😅 Before I got pregnant, I wrote and published three books. When I say the words would FLOW, I barely even had to think about it. My prose was not just strong, but interesting. I wrote things in original ways that felt unique to who I am as a writer. It was poetic and romantic and perhaps a bit overly-embellished, but it was unmistakably good. When I compare my work from 6 years ago, or 3 years ago, to today”

“Hello I want to hear input on postpartum recovery. I am 33 weeks pregnant and my mother in law came out of the country to stay with us for a few weeks before and about a month after baby comes. She's very helpful and I really don’t mind her being here as she’s very sweet and she has been here to help and get our house ready for our baby. However, I just found out her fiancé might be coming in from out of the country to stay with us during and after the birth of our son. She even asked if he”

“Hi! As the title says, i’m looking for some postpartum tips for keeping good mental health and making it a more positive experience. Some background info: i do struggle with anxiety but i am medicated & have been for 5+ years, in December of 2024 i delivered my first daughter at 20 weeks before she passed, I was obviously coping with the grief of that but everything was very manageable and i didn’t experience any massive swings in emotions. In July of 2025 I did experience a 14 week loss and”

“Hi! I have a 11 days old baby who I prayed for and love very much. Nevertheless, I’m so completely lost and exhausted, I know the fourth trimester is rough but I’m completely taken by surprise. My baby doesn’t latch great, I’ve seen a lactation consultant and it’s been helpful but it still takes an awful lot of time for him to get enough through breastfeeding. He falls asleep fast when eating and I have to continuously rub him and by the time he’s done with one breast (or I consider him to be do”

“(Also, a very honest post about postpartum depression) While I was pregnant, everyone, and i mean EVERYONE, who i knew who was a mother, told me when you are with your baby not long after birth you experience this beautiful calm, like a serene bubble where it's just you and your baby. They all basically described that. I didn't have that. Of course, I knew from the moment I saw my baby that I loved him and would kill and die for him. But I didn't experience that "golden hour.&qu”

“My baby girls first birthday is next month and I can’t think about it without getting really sad or wanting to cry. Any tips?? How can I stop myself from feeling like this? I can’t even start to plan her birthday without getting sad :(( submitted by /u/Repulsive-Coat-6606 [link] [comments]”

“Hi all, I’m curious if some of you experienced debilitating fear of child birth even while pregnant? Sorry if this is silly, but the idea of not feeling my legs after an epidural, or not feeling my body from my neck down during a c-section terrifies me. I’ve had panic attacks in the past just from the numbing sensation during a dentist appointment, and had to leave. Sigh. If you’re that person, how did you overcome this, or prepare? submitted by /u/limonepane [link] [comments]”

“Hey guys! I am a mother to an 18 month old baby girl. I always wanted to be a mother and was elated when I got pregnant. I had an easy pregnancy and easy delivery. But all hell broke loose after she was born. I had immense pain from episiotomy and couldn't sit straight for a month after delivery. I was staying with my mother and she was taking care of my food, the baby for few days (then I took over completely) but she used to get tired and sometimes got angry on me. I I stayed with my mothe”

“Overreacting My mom gave my baby baby food mixed with formula before I could. I missed my daughter rolling for the first time cause she did it in my mom's care. I feel like I'm missing her firsts, and it's eating me. My mom had a huge reaction to me asking for her to not tell me if my daughter crawls or walks before I can see it. Am I overreacting for wanting to be the first? I don't think I am. She used my bipolar diagnoses and being ppd against me saying it's a wild thing t”

“Just going to start by saying I was kind of naive because of how great my pregnancy was and how my baby was head down the entire time, I just took it for granted that I'd have a vaginal delivery. I did inform myself on C sections just in case there's complications, but didn't prep much in terms of how recovery is, how much to rest, how much up time is okay and when it's too much. I didn't food prep because I was sure I'd be up and about in no time. Well, here I am 7 days”

“I am living abroad away from family and while we talk a lot of the phone I dont have my mother or sister here to help guide me through. Was there anything you learned going through pregnancy that you think a first timer should know? Any products that I should get to prepare for later on? Any horrific symptoms I should be mentally prepared for? Again any tips or tricks or advice would be greatly appreciated :) submitted by /u/Agitated-Lake437 [link] [comments]”

“I’m 6 days pp and no one told me how much I would miss my firstborn. Like I just want to cry and hug her even when she’s right there. I miss her so much. I find myself looking at old pictures of her which is so silly because she’s right there. She’s playing and acting like her silly little toddler self. And I feel so guilty because my newborn is right here and all I can think about is my toddler. Is this normal? Because right now I just feel like my newborn is taking my time away from my toddler”

“I’m looking for some advice on new mothers having a hard time adjusting to new life. I love my boy but I’m having so much anxiety learning if he’s eating enough. Everyone tells me I’ll know but I feel by then it’s too late if he’s vomiting. I will feed 2.5 oz then wait 10 mins and if he is still showing ques I will give more. Lately in that ten mins he seems very content and will fall asleep. I’ve left the house 1 time in 4 days. I feel my husband is doing a great job with him and I’m not doing”

“I get it, it’s her body and she wants to recover in privacy. My parents live 10 mins away. Baby is due December. My mom is loosing her shit. Any tips on how I can process things better for my own mental health. I am a people pleaser and this sort of thing recks me. Because of things like this, this whole process just stresses me out and gives me a sense of dread rather than excitement (coupled with a return to office order, finances, ect lol) submitted by /u/goatman2 [link] [co”

“I have a scheduled c section in a few hours and my parents didn’t stop by to wish me well, which they normally have done in the past. They also didn’t even text me saying good luck. they did text me asking me if I still had my deceased grandmother’s shop vac though. Am I wrong for thinking it’s odd not to wish your daughter well right before a major medical event? maybe I’m being a suck? submitted by /u/Boom_Box_Bogdonovich [link] [comments]”

“It’s funny bc while I was pregnant I had so much advice and stuff from moms. Now that I’m freshly postpartum, I’m struggling so bad and nobody’s there for me or checking in on ME. Everyone cares about the baby only. Even my own mom is somehow forgetting how hard it is to have a newborn and is telling me it’s not that hard. I feel like other moms I know in my life haven’t reached out to me once. Postpartum is so hard submitted by /u/SandwichDependent199 [link] [comments]”

“I’m a single mom and by myself most of the time. I have an 8 week old and obviously exhausted. Every Sunday the family tries to get together. Except this weekend my mom text me at 8:30 PM on Saturday saying she missed the baby and wanted us to come over. The baby was sleeping so I said no. My baby still sleeps in 2-3 hour increments, so I try to start the process early, or I get no sleep at all. Then she guilted me saying I was being mean and back when she was a single mom she would go visit her”

“Honestly, everyone that is close to 4 months (either right before or right after), what are yall feeling right now? I need some solidarity! I feel so much more emotional now than I did at the beginning. I can’t pinpoint if it’s my IUD or if it’s postpartum feels. (I’ve been working with my psychiatrist). I’ve been feeling the sads, but also feeling like I’m living in a dream (even though I KNOW that this is all real), and my anxiety has me on edge all the time. submitted by /u/Sweaty”

“I have a 3 week old and have completely forgot everything about babies (my other one is 4). First time around I experienced very heavy PPD and don't really remember the first 5 months of my daughter's life, but I do know that the whole experience was shocking for me, so I don't truly know if we had a very colicky baby, or if I just handled it very badly. Either way, I now have a 3 week old (born 38+3) who has been far sleepier than I remember my first one being (during the day, anywa”

“My mom is the only parent in my life and my husband’s life. We’ve never been super close but since I got pregnant and had our baby, she’s been trying to be more involved. I appreciate that. However, when she wants to come over, it’s never helpful or comfortable. She doesn’t help with the baby, help around the house or bring food or offer to make food but requests to come over at least every other week. Both times we’ve had her over since the baby was born, she came over, yapped for a long time a”

“I’m 35w5d, I’m due 9/1 but will be induced anywhere from 37-39 weeks. A little bit of a back story, my mom died in 2008 (when I was 18), dad in 2012, paternal grandmother 2023, and paternal aunt 2024. I’ve lost the women in my life who raised me and meant everything to me. So I’m struggling to accept any help postpartum. My husband wants his parents to come (we live in OR they live in TX) a week post birth and I’m very much wanting it to be on my own terms. I don’t want to feel like I’m hosting”