Workers Stuck Under Toxic Managers
Employees consistently experience emotionally draining and often abusive behavior from their managers and leadership. This manifests as mood swings, micromanagement, public criticism, bullying, and a general lack of respect, leading to stress, anxiety, and a feeling of being undervalued. The environment fosters negativity and undermines employee morale.
SOURCES (60)
“When my coworker asked me to do a certain job, I said yes, even though I would rather keep doing what I was doing. I just get a really bad feeling like I’m in danger, and I would rather say yea than even let someone…”
“Often time Partners are crying babies ~ consider everyone accountable except themselves!”
“During a meeting in a room, my boss did a shout out and said my work was phenomenal. I quickly joked about it by saying thank you let me get out my phone. Can you say it again? Everybody laughed. I’m not sure if I said thank you again or not my question here is should I send my boss a private teams message and thanking him again for saying such kind words about my work? submitted by /u/IThinkYouAreNice [link] [comments]”
“Title. Just started as an executive recruiter with a new firm. Manager (also the owner) just chewed me out and called me f\\\\\\\*cking stupid in front of the entire office simply because he believed I spent too much time on the phone with a candidate (15 minutes). My colleagues came to me and said I’ve been doing great, and this is just how he is, always yelling at people and publicly humiliating people. I made the jump from my last role for better communication with leadership… this is not wha”
“Within a year two bosses in our department have had what basically amounts to a mental breakdown and left the position. Both had additional personal reasons, but a big one was constant uphill battles with their higher-ups who have no idea what our department does even though we bring in the biggest earnings to the company. We also don't currently have a functioning HR, so someone from the higher-ups personally made the job advertisement which is laughably simple and deceptive. It has barely”
“I need your advice to overcome an inner struggle. I have a program director who really doesn’t get involved in their job. They never supervise what is happening in the program. They have their favorites who get privileges, and they don’t evaluate people based on their performance, but rather on where they’re from, how likable they are, or their background—definitely not on how much they work. I don’t know how to deal with this program director. Many things feel very unfair, and unfairness trigge”
“TLDR: bosses and coworker have highs school level behavior and engage in toxic behaviors like insulting coworkers, sexualizing them and belittling them. After finding this out I took a step back to prevent involving myself in that but now getting treated poorly for it. Do I stay or do I quit? For context I work remote and started at a company about 5 months ago, became close with my boss and a coworker who later I found out to be very drama oriented and loves stirring the pot by sending screen s”
“I used to use noise cancelling ear pods and my manager would walk up to me and start talking at my head until I took them out”
“I'll preface this by saying, my former employer was full of the most incompetent and childish adults I've ever met in my adult life. This job has the worst turnover I've ever seen, the pay wasn't awful, but lots of freedom. I quickly found out that none of our managers do their job, so I spent most days pretending to be busy, however I'm smart, so the complex issues were brought to me and I singlehandedly managed a role that nobody else was qualified to do. I took the courses”
“I started my job over a decade ago as an intern. Started as a decent worker in my opinion. 2 years in, I was brought into my bosses office telling me I was not living up to expectations and that I would have a project to prove myself or ship out. I killed the project and was told by my boss that I was the greatest improvement my boss had ever made. 2 years later, I was promoted from intern. I've been promoted on other time beside that. Now, at this point, I have kids catching up to where I a”
“so i'm pretty good at gaslighting myself so i just wanted to ask if this was normal. it's my first legal assistant job (i applied with years of admin experience and have my masters degree) and i was thinking of going to law school in a couple years, so this was more a career move. ive only been working there a month and it already has been so draining ive cried four times in the work bathroom lol. its a small firm with ten people total. immigration law. the lawyers have all been wonderfu”
“HR in small orgs are always fucking idiots. I made the mistake of working briefly at a glorified startup where, a month in, my boss told me and my colleagues that we were all expected to work Christmas day and other bank holidays. When I went to the HR person to report to her that I'd been asked to do something my contract explicitly said I didn't have to do, she LITERALLY said "oh, weird" and shrugged. She also told us that we had fixed desks, then emailed the entire company t”
“You need strong and unquestionable support from leadership and extremely clear authority and autonomy. Work on building that first. If you get a single red or yellow flag, start looking for a new job immediately. I just came out of a situation like this and I’m traumatized. My first sign should have been when the CEO told me not to worry about pricing or margins when I was working on a new commercial model that he had asked me to work on. There were a million other things after that that should”
“I am burnt out and bored of being overworked yet blamed for everything within my current career. Had a new manager come in earlier this year and he has been horrendous. I am assistant manager and working under him, has become hell. Called in sick today because I couldn’t deal with it. He still managed to make me feel bad for not coming in. I was at the doctors yesterday with chest pain and dizziness. Do any of you know of relatively peaceful jobs? Maybe part time work? I am almost ready to go of”
“Hi all, frequent lurker of this sub here. I am F22 and I had experience yesterday with my boss that’s making me think that this first big girl job of mine was not the gold I thought it was. I’ve been having some trouble with my car that’s lasted about 3 months. The radiator’s busted due to my car having overheating issues, and through my position I have to use my car to complete tasks. Luckily, I live in the city so the tasks I have to complete often are very close to my job. So my car will brea”
“The forced forming relationships with staff would absolutely irritate me to no end. I’m not talking about asking how my day was going or saying good morning in a cheerful tone. I was watching our assistant principal (who is 100% about appearances and never says what he’s really thinking, just passive aggressive if he wants you to know he’s mad) giving fist bumps to every single kid walking into the school, and one of them obviously was not into it, and he was all in his face DON’T LEAVE ME HANGI”
“Once the behavior creates more work than the actual work, it's probably time to cut it.”
“I have tried everything I can think of up to this point, and now I am trying the last thing: help from strangers on the internet. I’ve been in my role for 2 years, at the business (education non-profit) for four (transferred from another department). This is my second career field, and I am 10 years into my life as a professional. Up until working at this institution (in my first field), I have gotten along with my coworkers, worked well with others, earned awards and been promoted. Left that fi”
“I’m a master electrician in germany, I have ADHD, and I’m starting to realize that my current job situation is affecting me mentally far more than I expected. I’ve been in a technical management position for a few months. My first official probation reviews were good to above average. Then, shortly before the end of probation, the feedback suddenly changed completely. Now I’m being told that I lack “role understanding,” that I’m not assertive enough, and that I need to act more like a boss. The”
“i work for a shelter conpany and honestly staff are treated like shit. we work with clients with severe mental health/addiction issues and staff have been assaulted, threatened, had food thrown at us, dealt with used needles, human waste, people peeing in elevators etc. management barely does anything about what we deal with. but when it comes to staff, they’re extremely strict. calling in sick requires us to call the site, email a supervisor AND fill out an online form. i’m now being repeatedly”
“Title. Just started as an executive recruiter with a new firm. Manager (also the owner) just chewed me out and called me f\\\\\\\*cking stupid in front of the entire office simply because he believed I spent too much time on the phone with a candidate (15 minutes). My colleagues came to me and said I’ve been doing great, and this is just how he is, always yelling at people and publicly humiliating people. I made the jump from my last role for better communication with leadership… this is not wha”
“I work in the HVAC field as an apprentice. I joined this company because I was promised by the owner that he would teach me everything about hvac. 3 months later, I'm still just a tool grabber. He gets mad when I stand and watch him to learn. Always wants me to stay busy even when there's literally nothing to do, but God forbid I actually watch and learn something. He gets mad daily so I try to stay out of sight and out of mind now. He won't let me do any technical troubleshooting bu”
“Just helps to get it off my chest. I work alone and sometimes I drive myself crazy!”
“I am a junior employee (4 YOE) about a year into my current position at a F500 company. My boss has a very hot temper: he yells and swears at people for minor mistakes (including things that are his fault), slams his fist on his desk while yelling at people and slams doors. There’s been more than one incident where people on the other side of the floor or the floor above us hear him yelling and come to investigate. Even when he’s not actively yelling, he acts very aggressive over random things.”
“I’m a master electrician in germany, I have ADHD, and I’m starting to realize that my current job situation is affecting me mentally far more than I expected. I’ve been in a technical management position for a few months. My first official probation reviews were good to above average. Then, shortly before the end of probation, the feedback suddenly changed completely. Now I’m being told that I lack “role understanding,” that I’m not assertive enough, and that I need to act more like a boss. The”
“I absolutely despise my workplace environment right now. The job is ok and I know I can do it well but the management and the office is so toxic. I have been working the same position for 4 years with amazing salary but my ultimate dream was to get into academia. Last couple months, I burned out to the point my health deteriorated and I physically can’t fathom going to my workplace any more. During majority of my lifetime I have been fascinated with history/ archeology and during my Bachelors I”
“I almost got into an argument with a smartaszz Shipping office female. Felt like I was arguing with my woman at home. smh. I had to let her get the last word in even though I was right about their stupid yard setup that they took over from another business. I would’ve said something to get myself in trouble. It was tough trying to hold back what I wanted to say. submitted by /u/InvstrJester [link] [comments]”
“Yes and no. Bad management, bad staff, bad clients - always been a thing. But the overall culture has taken a hell of a shift to the "We're corporate as fuck, fuck you". Things are needed now, and there's no down time. Tech meant we were always available, never waiting, and are expected to be far more productive. Also shit pay and benefits. I've never known or seen it be so extractive and uncaring, or willing to just burn people out. But that's basically the working env”
“On holiday, a senior associate just emailed to correct and intervene and help out on a non-billable team knowledge work. And the threat mode or whatever NPD/BPD anxiety anger spiral kicked in again, started smashing my work phone and laptop and then I weirdly slapped myself. A good reflection of my recent daily struggle. Like I’ve never done this before and have been pretty chill all my life. Shocked by the person I am becoming. So yes bye guys, I’m leaving this shit behind. No student loan so g”
“How do you deal with stressful job? Of course I cannot quit, I dealt with work bullying and now I feel like I take everything the wrong way. Patient had a seizure, colleague freaked and was short with me, felt like shit, started deliberately using hot water to hopefully snap out of it, did not work, so it ended with me secretly banging my hands and head on any available surface whenever I was sure I could not be seen. Also scratched my arm. I just need advice on how to get myself out of”
“I’m posting this because I genuinely do not want another employee to go through what I experienced at Pooches. My biggest issue with this workplace was how employees were treated. The actual work involved with the dogs was not what made the experience difficult. There were good coworkers, hardworking people, and employees who genuinely cared about doing their jobs. The problems came from management, communication, scheduling, favoritism, turnover, gossip, and the way certain situations involving”
“I feel terrible making this post, but I’m just a bit burnt out. We have a legal assistant and two paralegals. I primarily work with one paralegal and occasionally the assistant. The other paralegal helps out of kindness but does not work in my area and most of the time I’m helping her because she wants to break into my area; so it’s more teaching than assistant (which I don’t mind at all, it’s just relevant). My paralegal is competent but just so lazy. we have worked together for about four year”
“I've been working in my current role since December, but I feel as though I am not respected at work. One thing I have noticed, is that while I get along with my team to some extent, I am not as much a part of the in-crowd as they all are with each other. I generally don't get included in jokes or discussions, and people usually don't initiate conversation with me, unless I initiate first. Even then, it just becomes really bland small talk. I thought, at first, people just didn't”
“I need to have a talk with my supervisor tomorrow, and I need some good wording on how to bring these things to her. First of all, there's a lot of gatekeeping going on. I do not feel like her teammate. Whenever there is an event that human resources is supposed to organize or host, she doesn't share any of the details with me. I walk into these meetings blind and without an idea of what my expectations are or any way that I can help. I do ask her beforehand if there’s anything that I sh”
“How to stop, so that I don't end up being workfriend-less. It's been 10y I work. It started when I became the most senior of the team. But lately I realized something's wrong with me and I need to change. What happens : In meetings when I don't agree with people or how they approached something : I need to express and make sure they feel/understand my frustrations. It results in me being harsh in my words, and moralizing. Also I have a big tendency of cutting people when they are”
“here’s the link to my OG Post: https://www.reddit.com/r/antiwork/s/NEMCARaHY4 but basically last monday my manager told me that my critics were valid and that she could’ve been better. she extended my PIP by two weeks. thoughts?? i feel like i’m being played with lol. i’ve def done my work and done what they’ve asked and played positive the whole time submitted by /u/Quick-Economics4172 [link] [comments]”
Yeah, most mundane miseries come from apathy, not deliberate malice.
“Looking for opinions/advice: Is this a hostile work environment, retaliation, or just an incredibly dysfunctional workplace? I’m trying to figure out whether I’m dealing with a hostile work environment, retaliation, or simply terrible management. I’d honestly take advice, opinions, or just commiseration. This situation is much more nuanced than I can explain here, so these are the highlights. For four years, I’ve worked under my department chair, “Brenda.” In my experience, she routinely refuses”
“Hi guys, I work as an Inventory Controller at a certain company that construction products. In short I have a supervisor who came in this year and I think she doesn't have a clue how most things work and most of the work I do it personally. We are 5 in our department, the dispatch clerk, receiving clerk, procurement clerk, my supervisor and I. The issue comes whenever one of the other 3 is absent I'm always told to do their duties and their reports and sometimes I clock out late making s”
“I’m 28F and I’ve been at my current job for about two months. I’m new to office work, although I’ve worked for years in retail/hospitality (4 years total between a café and a restaurant). I also did a 3-month traineeship before this job, where everyone was happy with my work. A few days ago, my manager sat me down and told me that I’m doing badly. Like, really badly. They said I keep making mistakes that I shouldn’t be making at this point, that I forget things, and that I don’t give enough feed”
“Honestly, getting visibility and speaking up is more important than doing the actual work. I don't really make small talk at work either, but that doesn't really stop you from doing things like proactively having technical discussions or sharing your technical opinion where relevant. And you can go as far as to script your interactions or even having an AI tool help you script things live. Treat every work interaction as a technical exercise to maximize your comp.”
“I work as a recruiter for a company and our main office is pretty small, like 7 people for a company of 400 employees. I say this to illustrate that im constantly interacting with the people in my office. I was talking to my boss recently and she stops our conversation mid way and tells me that I'm "letting myself go" and that im doing a bad job at representating our office because of my appearance. She was looking at my hair when she said it. Ive had a buzz cut my whole life and I”
“I am 22. Not unheard of for a kitchen manager, but still pretty young. I pride myself in my work ethic and am always happy to hear advice people have to give me. I am far from knowing everything and I learn something from every new cook that I hire, and I always value their input. I tell them I am happy to hear their advice, but it will not always be put into effect. The older cooks that I hire seem to struggle with this. They think their age means they have automatic seniority (which is kind of”
“My previous job really shook me. It was my first job straight out of university, the pay was great, there was a lot of growth, and I stayed there for about four years. The first years were good, but after that it became increasingly toxic. I eventually ended up with a terrible manager — manipulative, hypocritical, conniving, and mostly focused on using me and the team for his own growth. The guy basically acted like he was living by The 48 Laws of Power. A lot of my coworkers weren’t much better”
“I walk into a thick mucus bubble excuse of an office every morning at the start of shift. The air is pregnant with a sarcophagus’ ass. The parts per million of shit in the air outnumbers the oxygen particles. I can’t take it, it smells like a farty meatball Sandwhich in here all the time, and my coworker has no shame of unloading the loudest boom in the room… follows it up with, “Everyone take cover!!! Haha”. I tried the vasoline in the nose trick, I’ve tried casually saying “hey man we maybe wa”
“We were getting slammed with patients, but that is nothing out of the ordinary. My coworkers were just being catty. I was running the two registers up front AND the drive thru, and can only do one at a time. I asked for help and got a snarky remark and no help. Then the line piled up. And finally I got some help but it was begrudging. Like I’m so confused. I am very aware that you have work piling up too, but the rule is always help the customer you have in front of you. And we’ve got 12. Like t”
“Hi Reddit, I’m dealing with a very complex situation with my ex-boss and I really need advice on how to safely handle this. The history: My former manager has two sides. On one hand, he heavily manipulated me—underpaying me while dumping an excessive workload on me because I performed well. On the other hand, over time, he recognized my value, gave me raises, supported my career growth, and checked in on me even after I left the company. He left me with trauma and control, but also real help and”
“A little bit about me: I’m a master electrician, I have ADHD, and I’m currently in a work situation that is taking a serious toll on me mentally. I took over a management position that had been vacant for about 1.5 years. My predecessor quit after roughly 1.5 weeks. I only found that out later, which in hindsight was obviously a huge red flag. For the first few months, I really threw myself into the job. I completed several technical projects, implemented my boss’s feedback and generally receive”
“If you’re employed you are controlled. Wake up bub. Let me guess you’re like 22 years old and just hitting the work force? If that’s not the case I truly do feel sorry for you. Stick up for yourself every once in a while. It’ll be ok.”
“She has an absolute obsession and it can't be stopped. My job was decent before, shit pay but at least I can work hybrid. Recently she tasked me with a logo redesign, I designed 3 logo variants in 2 days. Usually takes me longer but I entered a flow state. After sending in my designs she informed me that "Claude Ai" told her our colors are outdated and had a logo designed already. Like 2 days was too long apparently? I now have a very obvious Ai logo and new colors to rebrand the e”
“I am new to flex, as in I've done this for all of 2 weeks. Yet I've had mutiple warehouse workers talk to me like I'm stupid because I just wanted to make sure I'm doing things correctly. I even tell them I'm new! It's always older men, and maybe its because I'm very girly pop, but they talk down to me. And as a retired crash out, it is getting to me a lot. Like oh Im so sorry I want to make sure Im going to the right return area BECAUSE I HAD 5 WORKERS TELL ME 5 DIFF”
“So recently, I joined a company as a part-time employee as a fresh grad. They said they'll train me but in reality they just dumped their tasks on me and just gave me generic feedback. They scolded me for not being able to navigate through years of their files and process 2 weeks in. Now I just reached 3 months and I had a 1 on 1 talk with the Project Manager asking me why I'm not good enough yet. Keep in mind that she gives me the same amount of volume as a full time employee so there w”
“So I just started a new job after the last one I had was an absolute shitshow. The last experience taught me to try and trust my gut feeling more when it came to starting in new places. Today was my first day, it was kinda chaotic as a lot of first shifts are. You are there like ”what is this, where does this go, how do you want this done, who are you, who am I, why did I ever start working in hospitality, should I kms?” The people are SUPER nice and I really liked them, I am a bit iffy about th”
“So the company that I work for recently just brought in this girl that was going to be let go, but my Manager likes her effort so they transitioned her to our System Engineering team. Also important to note that I don’t take a lot of PTO, I’m never been talked to about my work, and I always hit above my billables. That being said I just feel like there’s a push to train this girl up and to boot me out. I don’t know it’s just this nagging weight on my chest. And like I said there’s been absolutel”
“It’s really hard to go from working with a guy every day. Getting to know each other like brothers then boom, Boss man shows up and gives guys the boot while im just sitting here still having to work. Having them act like the other guy isn’t even there anymore and exclusively speaking with me about projects right in front of the others. Its very awkward submitted by /u/TheUnlucky_Swammi [link] [comments]”
“Update on my post from last week about being 10 minutes late to a meeting and getting reprimanded by my boss for not hanging up on the customer to make it to the meeting on time (at my Customer Service job) : Yeah, I quit. I vacillated all weekend on the best course of action, literally all I thought about ALL weekend, but ultimately decided the thought of getting out as quickly as possible made me feel best. I am pivoting to my second job where I will be able to pick up equivalent hours within”