High-Net-Worth Individuals Grapple with Retirement
15 posts across 5 communities in the last 30 days; 60% from r/fatFIRE.
“Hi. Longtime lurker in this community, first time poster. I'm debating taking time off from my career to spend time with my kids while they are young. Financially, I don't think I can fully FatFire, so my big hesitation is that I get paid so much right now (golden handcuffs)…”
“It’s impossible to answer without knowing your retirement goals, annual expenses, what your wife’s pension is etc. These are relevant because $5M isn’t the kind of NW that renders your wife’s income completely irrelevant. That said, I find all these “ the time your wife will…”
“Can't they give their money away to a charity in their will?”
Individuals with substantial wealth are debating whether to retire now or wait for further accumulation. The discussion highlights the complexities of financial decisions and life priorities when facing significant resources.
SOURCES (60)
“I’m about to turn 44 and I’m financially on-track to retire at 50. My girlfriend is 39 and has her own career that she likes but doesn’t love. She is still of the mindset that she is supposed to work until 65 then take Social…”
“Meh. The OP has 50+ years of life expectancy ahead of them. The kids should be off the spend in 20 years so the majority of their life ahead (30+ years) will not include the kids expenses. [re: burnt out but feeling stuck bc lifestyle creep.]”
“We are 40+ and hubby retired in his 20s. It's an absolute fun blast. Travel trips, restaurants, and great food.... We get to hang out with our kid all the time. Differently? I would have had more kids by starting sooner. [re: For the 60+ that retired in their 40s... tell me about it]”
“I would like to retire within the next 2 years or sooner. Just looking for some insight from others. Here's some background and info. I'm 55 married with a 10 year old child. I've got 1.1 million in a 401k and roth 401k and approximately 10k in various brokerage accounts and an HSA. My company pension is approximately 24k a year. I plan to start collecting social security at 62 which is also about 24k a year. My wife (41 yrs old) will continue to work for another 15 years and I can j”
“Keep pretending it doesn't exist. She could live 10-20 more years and have a lot of expenses. Or marry a Nigerian prince. [re: Inheritance bombshell and options]”
“Is it even worth it when everyone you know is working? What?? Do you even like your partner? Start there. Everything is better. Shopping without crowds, enjoying long meals, annual memberships to all kinds of things you can do to during the day, all the time to do projects and spend time on hobbies, not being stuck gardening when it's raining since you have all week to get it done, you can take classes, and you can take turns taking shorter trips with friends. Wanna go see an exhibit in Lond”
“Hi. Longtime lurker in this community, first time poster. I'm debating taking time off from my career to spend time with my kids while they are young. Financially, I don't think I can fully FatFire, so my big hesitation is that I get paid so much right now (golden handcuffs), and with the pace of change in tech right now and the current hiring market, I can't imagine getting rehired in a few years and getting paid anything like I currently am. Can/should I retire (and when)? What wou”
“I'm in Missouri and I will be retiring at 52 with full payout. I still plan on working some job after retirement that has insurance for my girls while they are still in college/grad school.”
“Hi all, first time posting. Just wanted to get opinions on anyone in a similar situation, and if early retirement is a realistic option in the long run. We kind of fell into the FIRE morvement, never intended on retiring early, but here we are: Im 39, with a wife (37) and 2 kids (6 and 3). We have $3.9M in investments(mix of index and mutual funds), $330,000 in my roth IRA, paid off house (worth $1.75M), no car payments or other debts. Our required montly expenses (bills) are worst case $1500 a”
“Wow you are doing fantastic and GFY! You clearly have more than enough but there is no amount of money that insures against every possible future outcome (just ask the Romanovs). On some level you need to accept that the next million dollars isn’t going to move the dial on security any more. To deal with SORR I have a multi-tiered strategy: I use 3.5% as my SWR. This is conservative in most economic conditions and has a very low failure rate even with very long retirement durations. It would hav”
“Hi reddit PF - just interested to see if this is a pipe dream. My math seems to indicate it's possible? But 48 seems incredibly young... Slap me back to reality! My lovely wife (37F) and I (37M) came from relatively modest upbringings and have been active savers since graduating university. I've been in corporate finance my whole career, and she's been in advertising / marketing. We've lived in ~MCOL cities since graduation and would hope to retire in one as well. Earnings/Spendi”
“Throwaway account. My spouse and I are in our late 40s, HCOL, no kids, and trying to decide whether we’re actually ready to retire early or whether working another year or two would meaningfully improve the plan. We have roughly $4.5M in investable assets, excluding our home. Portfolio is around 75–80% equities (mostly in VOO with a 5-10% tech tilt sleeve) and 20–25% bonds/cash/Treasuries. The fixed income side is mostly T-bills, Treasuries and some TIPS rather than high-yield stuff. Our expecte”
“What does it matter what this woman’s children get? If she makes decisions about 15M (of her children) - she would be able to take care of herself as well. This may surprise you but women are human beings with their own agency It does not surprise me at all. You seem to think it’s ok that’s she’s left financially destitute, with nothing, on her partners death. I do not think that at all. On another hand, when you discourage OP from marrying her fiancé - you push OP towards her being "left f”
“If he dies, you get nothing but the memories. Are you implying that two children - are just memories?”
“Yes, BUT How old are the kids and how much time do you want to spend with them during that time? Young kids? Maybe don't take it. Older kids who have their own lives? Take it”
“Same shit that gets asked weekly Spouse #1 says it’s not fair for spouse #2 to take a step back and work part time. We need healthcare. Nw is about $4M liquid, 1.2M retirement. (Excludes $1M equity minimum in house. House might be worth way more than we think everything is up 27% YoY so could be $1.5-2M.) Debt is $1.5M left on the house at 6%. Costs: $315k for house (7-7.5 years and we are done) - $25.5-$40k for healthcare for family if spouse #2 does not work ft - daycare $24k and sitters $5k.”
“Great point. I would personally earn and save more, particularly given OPs age and most importantly it wouldn’t be fair to the spouse who is a substantial contributor to the described wealth.”
Does she want to stop working? Because she definitely can.
“I think you should decide if you want to try for another kid first. You have so little time for that, and it doesn't have to be coupled to a permanent retirement decision.”
“What does SHE want to do? It comes down to what will make your family better and happy wife = happy life.”
“You're absolutely right, that said different countries have drastically different views on this and for all I know OP is just translating to dollars. Maybe the solution is just writing a postnup, as beautiful and romantic as that is.”
“I think she could either stop working or find something that allows her to work from home then when you have the baby, stop working altogether.”
“I've done the math and everything seems to say go ahead and turn in the laptop but, ya know ... Short version, couple 44m, 43f, $2.6m in 401ks, $700,000 in taxable accounts, pensions provide $3.5k per month each starting at 60 and then inflation adjust starting at 62. Plan is to move from VHCOL area to LCOL, mortgage a modest home for $2k per month, and hit the chill button. We've both been doing high intensity staffer type work for 20+ yrs (somewhere between West Wing and Veep). Guardra”
“Imma push back a little and say uncertainty is also why it might be worse to stress yourself for 5 years when you can get a cancer diagnosis or be in accident any day. OP mentions trying for a kid and there's a clock on that, plus it's a big burden on mom to work during that snd early years. Sure most do out of necessity, but they have enough already to make things easier. There's a diminishing return on more gains and life has a lot more to offer than work.”
“It’s impossible to answer without knowing your retirement goals, annual expenses, what your wife’s pension is etc. These are relevant because $5M isn’t the kind of NW that renders your wife’s income completely irrelevant. That said, I find all these “ the time your wife will spend with your kids is priceless ” type of comments clueless,at best. This isn’t some sort of universal truth that is cast in stone. Fulfillment as a SAHM is a very personal thing. Your wife may want nothing more than to be”
“She should get the pension vested but lean back. Have the second kid and invest all the money she makes in high quality child care, house cleaning, a low cost (as in meal delivery) personal chef--things that will make your life easier and enjoyable and most of all free up time. Retired while pregnant with a 6-year-old isn't awful, but retired with a 4-year-old and an 11 year old is still pretty awesome and arguably more awesome. (Said having been in both situations as a parent, and we were/a”
“Vest and retire in 5 years. Enjoy your early middle age. Enjoy your current 6 yo and rejoice in not having to reenter the newborn phase at this point in life. I could make an argument for the other way too (fertility window really closing), but I would strongly favor the former.”
“Let her quit, have another kid, enjoy your life. You’re at 1M comp. People telling you anything else are LARPing or obsessed with the FAT part of FATfire. Some things are priceless. Make sure your life and etc insurance are buttoned up. Congratulations!”
“I would stick it. Knowing that she has a deadline makes things easier. By the time the new kid is born, maybe two years already passed. A vested pension will pay off bigly for the entire family if medical is included.”
“I'm newly retired, single, 67m with no children. My dad died at 93 and my mom is stlll living (age 92), so I hope to make it to 90. If I die before spending my pension, I'll leave it to my younger siblings.”
“Meh One of us (prob my wife) will likely grow old and feeble. She’s going to need some money for support. So instead of leaving heirs anything, we are saving for that. Best case scenario she doesn’t need it and we leave it to niblings.”
“I'm a former client of (and will be returning to) the company Childfree Wealth. My husband and I met with them before we got engaged to make sure we were on the right track. They have a lot of content in their newsletter as a podcast that will give you lots to consider. I highly recommend their services. For ourselves, my husband and I want to FIRE (50 is the goal) and are loosening our frugal reins to live some of our rich life now.”
“Understood. Many thanks for taking the time to qualify why it is not the wisest choice in your opinion.”
“True. That option would have me retiring at standard retirement age with $5+ million.”
“This is the answer. If it’s a quality of life issue take the SS, keep working, fund the 401k if she can and then do an immediate lifetime annuity on the K”
“I would think about how much she would get monthly, at 62 versus 65. She isn't going to retire at 62, and be left with out health insurance until she qualifies for medicare. What could happen is she goes over the income limit, I think they punish you up front on a higher tax of 1 dollar for every 2 dollar, but I also think they give it back to you in some capacity when you do reach full retirement age. From there, if she takes it at 62 and takes the forever lower payment, would it impact if”
“as a husband and father of 3, I will offer the advice that I would never trade more retired time for being married and being a father. Both are priceless.”
“Maybe I’m naive or bad at math (lawyer, after all), but it strikes me that with a decade or so of partner income, even a non-rainmaker could have their house paid off, kids’ college funded, and ~$10 million in savings, leaving them in a position to comfortably live our their days on dividends. Why don’t more partners retire at 45 or 50? submitted by /u/Pluto4500 [link] [comments]”
“Yeah, you're retired if you stop working and your household no longer requires either spouse to work for financial reasons. The titles may get silly in edge cases (like marrying rich and then never really working much in the first place), but for (fat)FIRE purposes one spouse leaving a substantial career at a # that no longer requires either to work is clearly retirement regardless of what the other chooses to do.”
“Life is about balance. Tomorrow is not promised. I just had an aunt die at 64. Her Retirement was having to stop working because of ALS until she passed 2 years later. I don’t need to be rich, I just wanna create memories with my people.”
“The question would be when retirement can be contemplated: 10-12 years from now (which is the non-negotiable barrier for us), 5 years from now (which feels stretchy), or now for one of us, which decreases household income by 35-40%.”
“A couple that I know are in their 30s, 7M in investments, no mortgage remaining. They have two kids as well. Plan is to quit in a heartbeat if they were in their 40s to spend more time with kids.”
That is correct. Leave the profession now and maybe you’ll have a chance.
“This is the way. Food and basic shelter being provided is very generous and more than many people have.”
“Personally I would work longer. You may have more children, a lot of things can happen in the 60+ remaining years of your life.”
“Hypothetical question: If someone is 40 years old, has $12 million in a 401(k), a non-working spouse, and two children (ages 5 and 6), would you recommend retiring now? Would it make more sense to start withdrawing from the 401(k) as needed while keeping the remaining balance invested for long-term growth, or continue working for a few more years? I’m curious what approach you would take and why. submitted by /u/themadfinancier [link] [comments]”
“Once you consider fat travel and private school there's really no practical upper bound, so if you have means you have to come to terms with your own preferences. You could easily have 2 high-earning, wealthy families next-door to one another and imagine multi-million dollar differences in K-college spend. One sends the kids to the local 10/10 publics before they go to UMich or Cal in-state. The other picks 50k/yr privates and then Vandy at 100k/yr COA. The major difference is preference not”
“This is very well put. The nanny cost is massive. Which makes sense you’re basically paying for another adult human to live.”
“With a one year old at home, time may end up being more valuable than another few million dollars”
“Yes. And, IMO, $500k is too low, but with the other resources it probably balances it out. Yes, the surviving spouse MIGHT figure it out with grandma and their job and retirement. But that can take a lot of time and process. Life insurance pay out is often fairly quick, and thus can be used to help with the process of "figuring it out." And, the remaining spouse still has to retire, so if they spend $200k of retirement money, now they are behind. Never count on an inheritance. That cou”