Mothers feel rejected when babies avoid physical closeness

“My little one is 11mo and is not a fan of physical contact. My boy is not cuddlier. In fact quite the opposite. If we stroke his cheeks or head, he will grab our hands and throw them. He pushes away from kisses and does not like cosleeping. He does however need to fall asleep in our arms before moving him to his crib. I read his cues and don’t force anything but I wasn’t expecting this so soon. Has anyone else had a little one like this? If so, what are they like now? submitted by /u”

“My son is almost 18 months old and ever since he started walking and I weaned him, he’s had a very strong preference for my husband. Like 80/20. If he’s hurt, upset or needs comfort, he wants Dada. Earlier today I reached for him when he was crying and he physically turned away from me and asked for his dad. It honestly broke my heart. We have a wonderful relationship otherwise. We have our own little jokes, I make him laugh constantly and we have plenty of meaningful moments together. But I mis”

“Basically what the title says. For a little while now he shows a strong preference for dad. Gets excited when he enters the room and cries when he leaves. Pushes away from me when I’m holding him but with dad he settles right in. Pushes my face away or turns away when I try to give him a kiss or hug. It’s starting to hurt my feelings a bit and I’m not sure what to do 😅 submitted by /u/Ordinary_Expert_3972 [link] [comments]”

“My 8 week old only wants me for food. I cannot settle him to sleep other than breast feeding, I can’t even sit and talk to him and look at his face without him becoming irritable. There have been a handful of times I’ve been able to talk to him and he’s been calm around me while not feeding. I thought something was wrong with him but I realized he only does this with me. Dad can get him to fall asleep with butt pats. Grandma can hold him and talk to him and he will stare and coo at her but I don”

“When baby was 2 months old could stand being read to and listened me sometimes even enjoyed and looked with enthusiasm at books but now at 3.5 months baby starts basically crying when being read to and doesnt even wanna look at any book... how do i adress it? Since reading is so benifitial for babies submitted by /u/UnfortunateMyself [link] [comments]”

“Im really struggling with worrying my baby doesn’t love me. Shes nearly 4 months and I know my hormones are probably getting in the way and blurring my judgement but I just really worry she doesn’t love me. Shes quite hard to get comfortable like I can’t sit on the sofa with her because she cries I can only sit with her on the rocking chair swaying back and forth and she will nap on me. Shes very much a Velcro baby and wants to be held but then also still cries when she’s being held. She doesn’t”

“Do any of you have a baby/child that’s never been super cuddley/affectionate or attached to you? My son is 14 months old and he’s never been super snuggley… we never co-slept because I was too scared to. He started sleeping in his crib around 12 weeks old because he started rolling over and outgrowing the bassinet already… and he really started sleeping a lot better once he was in his own room. Now that he’s one years old and teething bad or for example before getting his ear tubes he would not”

“My son doesn’t seem very interested in me at times and very inconsistently responds to his name and struggles with eye contact while I’m holding him. His three year old sister at his stage was much more interactive with us… responded to her name 100% of the time. Physical milestones he’s exceeding them crawling at 6 months now can hold and pull himself up trying to walk. Grabs toys reaches for things Any parents had similar experiences ? And how is it going now ? Thank you submitted by &#3”

“Son is 4.5. Last few months I might as well be a stain on the wall to him when it comes to pretty much anything. Hurt? I want mommy Bed time? I want mommy, I don’t want you to do it. Time to go to school? I want mommy to take me Time for pick up from school? I wanted mommy to come get me Time to go to bday party/some event? I don’t want you to come. I only want mommy there. The interesting thing is I am usually more patient with him and more tolerating during the meltdowns and involve him in mor”

“My LO is about to be 2 months on the 11th and for whatever reason I am obsessed with his milestones and what is normal and not. Crazy part is I already have a 10yr old and I feel like I never had this issue lol. With that being said I feel like my 10yr old always held eye contact with me at this age but I cannot remember when he did things anymore it’s all a blur. My 2 month old seems to only look me in the eyes when he is in a laying position or super alert, other than that he just looks past m”

“Baby was colic for 4.5 months and I developed postpartum depression during that period. I wasn’t able to bond properly with the baby initially and ended up seeing a psychologist for it. The constant crying and screaming absolutely wrecked me. My husband being the amazing dad that he is, went through 4.5 months of rocking a screaming baby constantly and putting her to sleep each day. The crying eventually ended around 4.5 months but somewhere during that time my husband became the default parent”

“He used to be very good about them and often napped when we went out. But since before he turned 4 months he started crying every time we went out. We transitioned him from the bassinet into the chair where he can sit upright and see, and he's still upset. I stopped torturing him and myself and stopped going for two or more weeks, but tried resuming them again yesterday and today. He seemed curious at first but then got upset quickly and I had to get I'm home again. He also likes car rid”

“Hi all, New father here. So my baby just turned 4 months this past week, and for the last 2.5 weeks or so now, has strongly preferred mom. This has been really hard on me as I really want to connect with my son and it is especially hard because when I get home from work (I try to get home as early as I can but it usually ends up being around 4 or 4:30) he is starting to get into witching hour which of course makes it worse. He is better on the weekends when I am with him all day. An example will”

“My daughter did something today that simultaneously made my heart melt and completely broke it, and I feel a little ridiculous about how hard it hit me. She's almost 6 months old, and today she woke up from a nap with her dad. She was happy to see me, and when I came over she leaned back like she wanted to be picked up, so I grabbed her, changed her diaper, and picked her back up. A few minutes later, her dad came around the corner and came over to give us a hug. And she REALLY reached for h”

“Why does my 6w baby literally kick and flail her arms when she eats??? I’m side lying in bed with her breastfeeding and she’s kicking/pushing off my legs and slapping my chest and boobs?? She doesn’t do it all the time but enough where it’s a bit much submitted by /u/Medium-Watercress-98 [link] [comments]”

“My baby girl just turned 10 months old and suddenly only wants her dad. Up until now, she was neutral and loved playing with dad , but now, even when I'm holding her, as soon as he passes by she reaches out her arms to go to him, cries for him, plays with him, and completely ignores me. She doesn't even care when I leave the room but she’s un hysterics once he’s gone. I'm the one on maternity leave who physically spends the most time with her, though my husband has been heavily invol”

“My baby girl just turned 10 months old and suddenly only wants her dad. Up until now, she was neutral and loved playing with dad , but now, even when I'm holding her, as soon as he passes by she reaches out her arms to go to him, cries for him, plays with him, and completely ignores me. She doesn't even care when I leave the room but she’s un hysterics once he’s gone. I'm the one on maternity leave who physically spends the most time with her, though my husband has been heavily invol”

“My son is 15 months and has been going through this phase of being mostly fine with everyone, but if I (Mom) am in the room, he is sooo fussy and clingy. My husband will be playing with him alone having a blast and once I walk in he just starts crying and wants to be held by me and only me. It kind of sucks for everyone because it’s hard for me to spend time with him because he’s just so fussy when I’m around. Anyone else experience this? If so, how do you handle it? submitted by /u/”

“My boy is a week shy of 12 months. Really never been a snuggly or cuddly. If he’s being held we have to be moving, no sitting on the couch just relaxing. He does like when I massage his legs and arms but that’s maybe 30-60 seconds and then he’s off. Anyways, he’s meeting all of his milestones without issue. Very happy boy. So motivated and curious. I’ve been a SAHM since he was born. He’s my first, so I guess I didn’t really know exactly what to expect. We frequent baby play group and have play”

“Why do people bombard you to come meet and snuggle your newborn, then seemingly drop off once your baby gets older and they’ve already met them? Does the novelty wear off? Common experience for others or just me haha submitted by /u/MatchaMean16 [link] [comments]”

“My angel of a baby is suddenly just crying and screaming nonstop. He is so sweet, but suddenly nothing makes him happy. He doesn’t want to independently play, but he doesn’t want you playing with him either. He doesn’t want to be held, but screams when you put him down. You can be right next to him and he just cries- move away and he cries even louder. He has two teeth on the bottom, I haven’t seen anything else pop through. He loves to eat, but I can’t just keep feeding him snacks all day to ke”

“I’m a FTM to my almost 8 month old. I’m a SAHM so I bring him out to a lot of baby activities and he accompanies me in a lot of my day to day errands. I’ve noticed recently that my Bub seems a bit more reserved/cautious than other Bubs. For example at Baby Sensory classes, he tends to watch and hang back before engaging in an activity unlike his friend who LUNGES and interacts with toys immediately. At mum group yesterday with other January babies, I noticed he was often preferring to be sitting”

“Our baby is 6 months now. Her sleep has improved but is still unpredictable, and her days are unpredictable too. Sometimes she’s happy and plays, sometimes she wants to be carried. I sometimes put on kids’ songs/videos just to get a break, which makes me feel guilty. But that’s not really the issue. I’m incredibly grateful for my life and my baby, so I feel guilty even saying this. But before the baby, my husband and I did everything together. If he played games, I’d sit beside him and read. If”

“I am a sahm to my 8 month old daughter, when we’re home alone she is whiny and fussy and wants to be held but after a few minutes of holding her walking around she wants to be put down, repeat. This past weekend i had a pageant so my husband took care of her the whole day while i got ready and attended, this is the first time he’s had a whole day alone with her, apparently she was great! It was “a lot easier than she used to be” and he got the whole house cleaned while i was gone. The next day m”

“My 9 month old has had an intense preference for dad the last 4 days and it’s breaking my heart. He pushes me away, cries as soon as daddy leaves the room and crawls after him and moans until he picks him up. He doesn’t care if I leave the room at all. He’s fine with me when we’re on our own but today it even felt like he was missing dad even then and was low key sad until he got super excited when he finally got back. I don’t know how to cope with this and I know it sounds super dramatic but I’”

“I’m a FTM so I have no idea if this is completely normal for everyone but I feel like my almost 8 month old is not affectionate towards me at all😭 he doesn’t like cuddling and he’s such a content little boy he I feel like he doesn’t care if I’m there or not lol. He will fuss if left alone too long sitting on the floor but I think it’s just bc he’s bored. We went on our first overnight and left him with the grandparents and when we got back he gave me a smile and didn’t really care. I feel like”

“My daughter of 4 month old can recognise if I am there in the house or not, not sure how she senses it, but she is not being with anyone of my family members when I am not around, though she knows them Last night, we attended a reception party and she was sent home with my mom who bathes her, as it was raining heavily She started crying profusely and dint stop though my grandmom, granddad and my mom tried diverting her, gave her the bottle of pumped milk Nothing worked Only when I rushed back fr”

“How much socializing does my baby need at 6 months? He’s in a phase where he seems like he wants to be left alone. Playtime, holding him and talking to him, carrying him while I do chores etc seems to overwhelm him within 15-20 minutes. He’s happiest for longest stretches playing in his play pen with all of his toys but I feel like we aren’t getting enough interaction. Is this just new mom anxiety or am I being reasonable? submitted by /u/ghostly-pumpkin [link] [comments]”

“My almost 15 month old has been extraordinarily clingy with me from 4 months and onwards. We have someone coming out tomorrow but im worried they will just say "shes a baby, its what they do" sorta thing. But im genuinely concerned for her behaviour at this point. When she turned 4 months old, she hated being put down, she hated going to her dad UNLESS I was out the house or she hadnt seen me for the day yet (like if he got up with youngest then she'd be absolutely fine) I was a st”

“He crawls towards me, puts his arms up, wants to be held, wants me to pick him up, but if I try and snuggle him, touch his little face, embrace him, he pushes me away. But if I put him down, or just sit him in my lap, he’ll just to crawl back up me and dig his head in my chest. How am I supposed to get things done with this kind of baby? lol submitted by /u/throwaway84583077 [link] [comments]”

“Apart from my husband, my elder child and I, we have 2 more people in our “immediate village” in the form of hired help. I rank last. And it hurts. Baby will willingly jump out of my arms to catch hold of one of the hired helps. He used to run to me everytime he saw me after a while but now he’s happy to give me a quick smile and go back to doing whatever he was doing. But if he sees the hired help even after just 10 mins, he will run to her. He’s not unhappy with me. He will have fun with me. L”

“I’m a FTM of 5 month old baby girl. I’m with her all day breastfeeding, playing, bathing. Everything is mostly done by me. My husband does bedtime and early morning. She is a happy baby smiling and playing with everyone. I have started to notice recently she does not smile at me or get excited at my sight like she would usually do for everyone else. This makes me a bit upset and I feel like she is not as fond of me maybe submitted by /u/UpbeatDance6842 [link] [comments]”

“I’m a FTM of 5 month old baby girl. I’m with her all day breastfeeding, playing, bathing. Everything is mostly done by me. My husband does bedtime and early morning. She is a happy baby smiling and playing with everyone. I have started to notice recently she does not smile at me or get excited at my sight like she would usually do for everyone else. This makes me a bit upset and I feel like she is not as fond of me maybe. submitted by /u/UpbeatDance6842 [link] [comments]”

“Baby doesn’t seem to like being held by me (aka mom). She cries and tries to kick away. She quiets almost instantly with my husband and my mom, even though she does still get finicky with her. Why does this feel like rejection? What am I doing wrong? Is this developmental? Does it end? It’s to the point where I get anxiety when I’m alone with her because I’m afraid she’s gonna rage when I try to calm her and get her to sleep. Also my irrational side thinks she’s not gonna know I’m her mom or she”

“Did anyone’s baby take to a stuffed animal more than a lovey? We’ve been putting a lovey in our baby’s crib the past few weeks to see if it would help her self soothe. She’s almost one year old and wakes 1-2 times per night. However, she basically ignores it until she wakes up in the morning. She’ll play with it for a bit in her crib. This weekend we took her to Build-a-Bear to make the pay your age birthday bear. She’s like in love with the thing. Hugging it and giving it kisses. We put it in h”

“I have a 14-month-old little boy. He's always been super happy and energetic, but not the biggest on hugs. He's usually more interested in figuring out the next thing that he can get into, or throw, lol. Today, out of nowhere, he's super affectionate and a bit clingy. Today was the first day that I can remember when he sought out my wife and me for a hug. Normally, he wants to go up high or touch something. Has anyone else experienced something like this? submitted by /u/”

“My child is 23 months old. He absolutely refuses to hold our hands when he is walking. We can’t even gently guide him by touching his head without his protest. When we go to the store or run errands, he will start in the shopping cart but then want to walk. Sometimes I can distract him and keep him in the cart. When I let him out, I usually try to keep him busy by having him put items in the cart. However, he will not go back into the cart without causing a scene. And if we go outside he will no”

“My baby is now 6 months old and honestly, he is the cutest little thing. I’ve been really happy being his mum and watching him grow, especially now that he’s becoming more interactive and developing his own little personality. But lately he has developed a VERY strong preference for me, and I’m getting really, really tired. My husband genuinely tries to help and is very involved. But whenever our baby cries, he almost always wants Mum. If my husband picks him up and tries to soothe him, he’ll so”

“My once-upon-a-time cuddle bug is now 14 months and cannot be held for a single second without thrashing and needing to get going. What age did your little ones start cuddling again!? I can’t wait hahaha submitted by /u/WebkinzMurderer69 [link] [comments]”

“LO was breastfeeding exclusively until he started solids, but he still nurses before bed. Since he started crawling he has always favored me. But lately he just absolutely only wants me. He will shake his head no and scream anytime dad tries to pick him up, or even play with him. I hope it's a phase because I can't catch a break submitted by /u/bizzzznesss [link] [comments]”

“When did you feel some love for your child? First child was born 2.5 weeks ago and I’m unfortunately feeling nothing really for him - I know he’s just a baby, but when do they stop being a soulless goblin? As a new parent I’m trying my best to look after him, feeding him, white noise, nappy changes, warm clothes, holding him, rocking him, and yet he just continues to cry and cry and cry and cry. Is there always a reason or do sometimes babies just cry themselves to sleep due to overtiredness? I”

“Hi all my baby girl is 4.5 months old. She’s obsessed with me too. When we go down and see my mum, she freaks for the first like hour. Doesn’t matter if i’m holding her, she’s holding her - no matter what. Today i held her the whole time/played with her and my mum just sat off to the side only occasionally talking/interacting with her to not overwhelm her - still cried! It wasn’t until maybe after an hour she was ok with my mum - was ok with being held by her/would talk to her. Not sure if this”

“I had my baby 3 1/2 months ago and feel like my baby now hates me. I was in the hospital recently because I had to get my appendix out and now he won’t stop crying anytime I hold him. He won’t breastfeed anymore and it’s breaking my heart. We used to have a great breastfeeding relationship and now it’s down the drain from me being away for a full 24 hours. So now with the healing and everything I have a baby that doesn’t even want me anymore. I feel like I’m back to square 1 all over again. We s”

“My LO has always been high needs and used to be incredibly fussy. I'd have to hold him constantly, and walk around - wasn't content with me sitting. That all started to improve and he was able to play with toys while watching me cook or fold laundry and I felt we were turning a new leaf. Then 8 months hit and WHAM! We are back at it. He cries about EVERYTHING. I put him down, he cries. I pick him up, he cries. I make him laugh, he laughs then starts crying. He screams bloody murder when”

“It’s hard not to overthink things. I feel like this week window. I’ve been entertaining my baby and he just doesn’t wanna look at me. It makes me forget about all the good interactions we have. I feel like he really focuses on people when they’re standing around him versus when they’re right with him example a person walking into the room and speaking to him he will look and smile and shouts at or someone standing next to you in general. The Doctors is at the office officers etc. Would say he ha”

“I love my baby endlessly. She is my second born and is the best thing ever!!! She’s 13 months old and our feeding history has been rough from the beginning. We have been through a breast aversion, bottle aversion and now feeding gagging issues with solids. She is also HIGHLY sensitive- hates the car, hates the stroller, hates new people, hates the seat we put on the bike for bike rides. I remember it being difficult with my son growing up but not THIS difficult. The speech path we are seeing sai”

“I’m scared that I am not as attached to her as I should be. She’s 9 months old and I do love her but I generally feel ambivalent about her when we’re together. I have mom friends and I feel like I’m taking her to hang out simply just for my benefit. She just kind of comes along. I sit and watch her crawl around (sahm) during the day, unsure how much I should be playing with her. I just watch her do stuff. Is there supposed to be some crazy love connection? How do I get over feeling like she’s ju”

“I’m really struggling right now. My (9 month old) baby is so much calmer and more affectionate with my husband than with me. He naps on him, cuddles into him, seems totally content. With me he thrashes, pulls my hair, and I can’t seem to soothe him the way my husband can. I go in for a kiss or to give him attention when my husband is holding him and he turns away or pushes me away. It’s making me feel like I’m not his ‘real’ emotional attachment, like I’m just the person who gets him through the”

“I’m posting this because I genuinely don’t know how to process what I’ve been feeling, and I’m hoping other moms might understand or have been through something similar. My child has preferred other people over me pretty much since birth. I don’t mean just occasionally, or that he enjoys other people too. It has been a consistent pattern where, given the choice, he seems to want someone else—my parents, other family members, other people around him—over me. And honestly, it hurts more than I kno”

“My baby is 11 weeks old and recently (maybe In the last two weeks?) will be making hunger cues (aggressively sucking hands, sticking out tongue, rooting on my finger if I hold it up to his mouth, smacking lips, sucking on my shoulder) but when I bring him to the breast he screams and arches away. It doesn’t matter what position I try he will get upset. If he was calm before he will still lose his absolute shit when I move him to the breast. The ONLY way in this case I can get him to latch is to”

“My 11 mo stopped cuddling me when she was 6.5 months old and started crawling. As soon as she figured out she could move she just wouldn’t stay in my arms (sad). So my question is would she ever cuddle me again? I just want one hug where I’m not forcefully holding her and she is not grunting to break through. If yes, WHEN? submitted by /u/Minute_Success5265 [link] [comments]”

“My 6 month old boy is a very happy baby. Genuinely rarely cries unless he needs fed, is always smiley and a joyful little guy. This was until about a week ago, now during his wake windows he is SO fussy. I originally thought he was bored, so I am out here working my butt off to entertain him. But now I’m wondering if I’m missing something? He’s not obviously ill or anything like that, I’m not seeing any signs of teething. Has anybody dealt with this? Or have any ideas/ thoughts? submitted”

“I'm a FTM to a 10m old. Baby spends 90% of her awake time with me so I understand it's natural to prefer being around me. Also she just popped 4 upper teeth at once and the poor thing is really suffering atm so that may affect the situation. However, she won't allow anyone to hold her, sometimes not even my husband. I'm physically exhausted. She's 97th for weight and I'm carrying her pretty much all day. My wrists started cracking. My elbows hurt. My husband takes her and”

“She’s 18 months old. Kisses her teddies. Kisses her aunt and uncles. They don’t babysit her and maybe see her twice a month if that… Doesn’t kiss me or her mom. Hugs us and nuzzles us. Not a peck. The fuck is this shit?? We kiss her all the time too. She has never kissed me since the day she was born either. She used to suck my wife’s face off early on, but I wouldn’t call those kisses. submitted by /u/Purple_Calendar3919 [link] [comments]”

“I know this might sound crazy. But my baby keeps crying with me. He’s 8 months old. Even when i pick him up from his grandparents after work he doesn’t wanna leave them and cries in my arms. When we get home, we’re fine but once he sees his dad, he only wants his dad to hold him, feed him, whatever. He’ll interact with me and play with me. But i can’t hold him and like put him to sleep, he screams and cries BLOODY MURDER, and then Dad takes him and he calms down. Maybe will go to sleep, or just”

“We used to never be able to put our baby down without tears. Not on the mat. Not on the swing. Nothing. Not until he was like 5 months old. Now at 7.5 months I’m able to do dishes and laundry while he bats at his toys and blows raspberries. YAY! It’s a good thing too, because he’s like 20lbs now submitted by /u/Slow_Competition2742 [link] [comments]”

“I have noticed, that my 4,5 week old baby doesn't react to my (her mom's) involuntary bodily reactions, like sneezing, laughing, coughing, farting, hiccups, twitching... But does to her dad's. She might sleep in my arms and I get a sneezing fit, and it doesn't faze her at all, but my husband at the other end of the room coughs one time and she's awake. Has anyone else noticed the same? My hypothesis is that she was part of my body for so long, that all my sounds are "her”

“I’ve noticed that my son (3) prefers my husband over me for a while now and I haven’t let it bother me too much since I figure it’s normal development. I only work part- time and I’m home with him more and I’m also the more rule-oriented and disciplined parent but the last couple of weeks it seems like he actually dislikes me… He’ll wake up in the morning and his face will fall if he notices it’s just me and that his dad has already left for work. Or he’ll insist on his dad for bedtime or to onl”

“To be fair I’m a very clumsy person. I’ve accidentally (LIGHTLY) smacked her head on her car seat or snagged a finger getting her dressed/undressed more times than I can count. Now I feel like she looks at me and doesn’t trust I’m not going to hurt her… When I use to lay her on my chest she would immediately soothe and be calm. She was teething like hell today and I put her on my chest. I haven’t done that in a while. We haven’t been contact napping because I’ve been crib training her for a mont”