Nurses feel emotional pain from pediatric patient loss
10 posts across 2 communities in the last 90 days; 90% from r/nursing.
“Sick kids make me too sad. Doing painful things to small children would wreck me. I'm glad other folks can do it, because all the peds staff for my kids have always been amazing!”
“I can’t tell you how many hands I’ve held at 3 o’clock in the morning. How many prayer circles I’ve been a part of in the middle of the night. I’ve watched too many children die, but on the flipside, I’ve saved a lot of lives too. We all have. Mom is going to be 77 next month…”
“Not sure... but I hope being a nurse isnt getting in the way of him getting mental healthcare he may need.”
Burned-out nurses, particularly those in pediatrics, experience significant emotional distress due to the loss of patients. One nurse describes taking this trauma home and impacting their family, leading them to leave that specialty despite a passion for it. Another expresses gratitude for positive memories but acknowledges the toll.
SOURCES (14)
“When I was a nurse extern I worked primarily in pediatrics. I loved my patients and I hold that experience close to my heart. However, the things that I have witnessed have marked me for life. I do not like to see abused children. One…”
“Children are a sensitive subject, to see them dead, gravely ill, or abused by the blue are unbearable to me to see (I was a former beaten child, it would tear my heart to see an innocent being in this state)”
“Sick kids make me too sad. Doing painful things to small children would wreck me. I'm glad other folks can do it, because all the peds staff for my kids have always been amazing!”
“Because I couldn't separate myself from being a mom in that environment. I empathize too much with the parents. Also peds medication dosing is terrifying”
“I can’t tell you how many hands I’ve held at 3 o’clock in the morning. How many prayer circles I’ve been a part of in the middle of the night. I’ve watched too many children die, but on the flipside, I’ve saved a lot of lives too. We all have. Mom is going to be 77 next month. Most days she doesn’t know what day of the week it is. She thinks it’s October already. My grandmother was diagnosed with dementia at 77 and passed at 81. I hope she goes quickly. I would be OK if she died tomorrow. You al”
“Not sure... but I hope being a nurse isnt getting in the way of him getting mental healthcare he may need.”
“This is one of the experiences I've had as a Pediatric Hospice RN. I've been a Hospice RN since the 1980s working in an AIDS inpatient facility Later I moved into a 10 bed adult then all ages Hospice Inpatient Unit with the average life expectancy frequently was three days. Nearly 30 years ago I moved to a Pediatric Hospice Inpatient unit for newborns to age 17 years old to give the families more support with other young family members to share their coping with dying children. Now I wor”
“Wow, sounds so intense and I am glad that you had a reasonable amount of support. The fact that you spent so much time with this patient and their family tells me that their end of life journey was a journey filled with care and attention and concern. They will remember you with appreciation and you can feel satisfied that you did an excellent job with your presence and quick actions with the code. Bravo for your good work and your sincere care for your patient.”
Same here. I would cry every day if I worked in the PICU.
“What burns me out is the endless demand and lack of fulfillment. I am burnt out feeling like I need to clone myself and physically be in 6 places at once in order for my patients to feel adequately cared for. I enjoy the pathophys of the many diseases we see (yes it's cardiac stepdown, but we see everything apart from mother/baby, ortho, neuro). I enjoy educating patients, supporting them through the entire treatment processes, and even enjoy training students and residents. I enjoy complex”
“To be clear, I love Pediatrics. I wake up every day SO grateful to be where I am, doing what I love, in a specialty I love. I love working at a huge Level 1 Trauma center (the best and biggest children’s hospital in my state!) and get to see so many cool things. But lately I just feel like I’ve been suffocating. I’ve been inpatient for over a month and lately it just feels like I’m surrounded by death and encephalitis and the worst possible things that can happen to kids. We had 4 kids die in th”
“I’m a nurse. I’m also the parent of a 25-year-old who died of cancer last year. I would like you to know that we, the family, also think of you. We’re so grateful to the care you gave to our child and to us. We talk of you often. We’re grateful to Luke, and Andrew, and Shea, and all the other nurses who cared for our son. You’ll be in our hearts forever. I’m so sorry. I do inpatient rehab and I’m also an instructor because I could never do oncology or ICU or NICU. But I’m so so grateful for all”
“Thank you 🫶 it was hard but I’m doing much better now. My heart is still in peds but that’s exactly why I can’t go back. It’s too hard for me and I take it home to my family and it’s not fair. I will always cherish the lives I saved and families I made an impact on. Seeing the kids make news for getting their transplant when I was the team that did it is a feeling unlike any other… but the loss was just too great for me to handle”