Parents Struggling with Child Behavior

“TL;DR: My 5-year-old often struggles to follow through on simple instructions, remember things we’ve recently practiced, and solve problems independently. We’re looking for practical parenting strategies to help her build confidence and develop these skills without making everyday activities frustrating for either of us. We have three wonderful kiddos (7F, 5F, 2M), and I’m looking for some outside perspective on how to better support our middle child. All three have very different personalities.”

“I feel like my husband and I fall into the trope of the passive mom and stern dad. I have done a lot of research into gentle authoritative parenting, but my husband default to authoritarian intimidation instinctively. Could this discrepancy be the reason my 3 year old is lashing out violently towards me? submitted by /u/Dry-Resolve-TA [link] [comments]”

“I have a relatively calm and chill toddler. Almost 3. Recently he’s in some developmental leap and really pushing every boundary and I just have so little patience with him. I don’t know how to be better. I threw his markers in the trash today because he kept taking the tops off and throwing them everywhere. I’ve been yelling and catching myself getting so disproportionately angry. He won’t let me get things done around the house and he asks me to play with him I have to keep saying no. It’s lik”

“I’m curious if anyone has a lot of the more traditional ways of parenting where they grew up that they just aren’t doing with their LOs. I’ve heard countless stories of people expected to strictly follow what was done in their culture/religion/society and how hard it can be to admit it to others, research it and practice it. Usually this is just sleeping arrangements, but the amount of Cruelty I’ve seen from others as soon as someone admits they won’t be bedsharing for the years to come? Yikes t”

“I'd love to hear from any parents out there who've struggled with impatience and anger, and have found ways to cope. I have an amazing 2.5-year-old who drives me round the bend. The most common trigger points for me are mealtimes, which can be painfully slow. At their best they're a constant negotiation. At their worst they're a battle. Every few weeks I shout and make her cry. Queue a whole wave of shame... (It's been like this from the early days of solid food - although th”

“My son (7) is a really challenging kid to parent. Tons and tons of great qualities, but challenging nonetheless. He also has adhd. We had to take him off of his medication which was working SO well because it starting causing some intolerable side effects. His doctor requested we finish out the school week unmedicated to see how he does and it’s been a nightmare. Crawling under desks during lessons, kicking chairs, pulling on kids shirts, banging on tables and making noises to get attention, he”

“I have two children, 6 and 2. Bed time is always a draining struggle in our household. My eldest is not great at winding down at night and has sensory needs that mean sometimes they have to get more rowdy before they can relax their body. My youngest is generally a great sleeper and will ask for bed when they've had enough for the day. The issue I am struggling witb at the moment is after showers, my youngest is having meltdowns every single night when it comes to getting into their pyjamas.”

“Hey Dads. I’ll keep this brief - my wife and I both have ADHD and our 5 year old daughter does also. She’s started kindergarten and while she is enjoying it and all reports say she’s doing great, the restraint collapse and exhaustion are real. This has meant that bedtime and morning routines are an absolute battle every day. She’s getting enough sleep, I think. 11 hours most nights. Any tips or suggestions to help make the start and end of every day not feel like pulling teeth? We have checklist”

“I have 3 kids. 8,5, and 6 months. My first born has always been a handful. He talks CONSTANTLY, is very argumentative, always has to be making noise and moving, and is constantly on go mode. I am the complete opposite of this, and I find the way he acts so incredibly annoying. I feel terribly guilty for feeling this way. My 5 year old is more quiet and reserved like myself, and I don’t get annoyed with her. I don’t want my son to ever notice this or feel that I have favoritism but the older he g”

“I’m struggling with a recurring dilemma with my 3-year-old son: he gives up on tasks almost immediately, but we’re often on a tight schedule. The best example is getting shoes on in the morning (though it happens with a bunch of other stuff too): Toddlers need immediate, logical consequences. But when he’s just passively stalling or sitting on the floor, what’s the actual immediate consequence? Lectures don't work and timeouts just make us even later. I want him to build self-sufficiency. Bu”

“My wife and I are generally on the same page about parenting and how we approach it. With that said, she has an infinite amount of patience that I just don't have. Because of this, we sometimes go in different directions with how we handle things. I'm definitely not saying I'm right in these scenarios, and without a doubt working on having more patience is something I continue to do. Being perfectly honest, I don't always feel the gentle parenting approach is working, at least in”

“How do you teach your toddler no and stop? I feel my patience leaving my body with my 17 month old. I have one and I feel I am a pretty easy going mum but some things they just cannot do obviously and their ability to listen is none. I do understand they’re super young, but surly they can listen just a tad? The no, remove, no, remove, repeat is a game. Smiling, laughing game. Like blowing bubbles in the dog water bowel, that’s a no. I literally have to move the water every single time we are out”

“I’m currently struggling in effectively communicating with my 6yo boy, and it’s causing a lot of stress on everyone in our house. Instead of ranting and going on about it, I’m hoping for some insight in how you would handle this situation that happened last night. We got home late from the fair, but my son was still awake and we told him that he needed to brush his teeth before bed. Toothbrushing has always had ups and downs with how much of a fight he puts up, but the past few weeks have been w”

“My (38f) in laws (71f/72m) just don't seem to know what a normal child acts like and it's really frustrating at times. Ever since he was 2 and just toddling around it's "he's very willful" "he's not very obedient" "these tantrums are a problem" "he froze up and wouldn't do what I told him to, that doctor you're taking him to is worthless." The thing is, he's not like violent screaming throwing things. He just does what he wa”

“Hello all. Right to the point, looking for advice on how to plan or org your time. New dad (4 1/2 months) I have ADHD and pre baby the habit was to lock into a task for a few hours. Now if there ever is a hour of time everything is disrupted, stop start kind of thing. I'm not a huge fan of leaping into a task for 10 min during a spare moment but should I be looking to embrace this? How do you plan/manage/prioritize tasks or hobbies for "free time"? Any other advice welcome. s”

“I'm wondering if anyone else has had this experience and how you've dealt with it. I wouldn't call us young parents, but we are often the youngest parents in our social circles. We are 38, and have kids ages 9 and 5. We live in an area where most parents we interact with are 5-15 years older than us. I'm not sure what it is (maybe we look young for our age?), but we've noticed over the years that people will find reasons to ask our ages and bring up our relative youngness in”

“Family of four and we all have adhd! Yay us. Some of us are inattentive, some inattentive and hyperactive. Our house feels so chaotic and I feel like I have no control over anything. I can’t even get all of the plans I want to do in a day out with my kids because they just feed off of each other and I basically feel like I’m ignored half the time. I have asked them both multiple times not to wrestle or physical play because my younger son always ends up getting hurt because my older son accident”

“There are probably a dozen little moments every day where I feel myself losing patience. The crying when I'm already exhausted. I don't let it out on my child doesn't mean I stop feeling it. Sometimes by the end of the day I feel so full of irritation over things that weren't really anyone's fault. I love my kid. I'm just tired of feeling like I'm constantly swallowing my own emotions to be the calm one. submitted by /u/No-Gas8702 [link] [comments]”

“I need some guidance from experienced parents. My oldest child is a 4.5 year old girl. I love her so much and she is amazing in many ways, but being a SAHM to her the past 2 years has been challenging for me. She is advanced with her language and picks up on phrases she hears and will use them. Lately she has been claiming that “nobody loves her” at the slightest inconvenience or correction. She also melts to the floor whining constantly over everything and groans loudly, and will also say thing”

“Hi all, I (24f) and dad (27m) have been struggling with kiddo’s (4m) temper and I’m looking for any advice on how to co-regulate, and teach helpful self soothing techniques. My approach when a meltdown seems imminent tends to be state the expectation firmly and calmly, try to limit any back and forth to avoid a power struggle, and if he flips his lid I try to stay nearby but look unaffected and take deep breaths, he usually joins me pretty quickly and if he needs it I offer a hug and sometimes a”

“I am a SAHM to 3 kids aged 4, 5 and 7. I’ve always been really proud of having well behaved kids but lately I am so frustrated with them all the time. We cannot get out of the house on time, without a million reminders and without me frustrated as hell in the end. I do everything by the book, I prep them about how much time we have, I set timers, I give warnings. We lay out the plan beforehand „ok guys, we now only have a couple minutes left so let’s start getting our shoes on…” everything. In t”

“6, 4, and 2 year olds, roughly. personally diagnosed with adult adhd in my twenties, treated but that just gets me through the work day. the clutter is never ending. what do you do to cope? tackling tidying post bedtime is…..well it’s not working at the moment. submitted by /u/tst0rm [link] [comments]”

“I have two kids - a toddler and a 8m old. My 8m takes two naps a day so I get a little "break" (if you even want to call it that lol) while my toddler very seldom takes a nap anymore. So, usually after I put the little one to sleep, it's just me and my toddler who is very, very attached to my hip. I don't get the luxury of silence to where I could think for most of the day, and my baby still wakes up several times a night. Safe to say I'm a zombie most of the day and it abs”

“For me, I’m learning to take my time. My kids don’t care if the dishes are done five minutes earlier or if I answer a text message. If I’m sitting on the floor playing with them or watching one of their favorite shows. They’ve taught me that being present is often more important than being productive. submitted by /u/Lo_Loki [link] [comments]”

“Since my son turned 4 my wife and I keep waiting for some king of behavior change, but we’ve been stuck in this spin cycle of hitting, whining, lying, and complaining. Lately we’ve been trying to just not respond to the whining, yelling, and complaining, but he is so tenacious. I feel like he never stops and all day long we are at odds. Our house feels so uncomfortable. We both WANT things to be different because we had awful upbringings but I feel like we have tried every behavioral implement I”

“I know this sounds horrible but let me try and explain it better. I have 3 kids: my 5 year old daughter, my 3 (almost 4) year old son, and my 1 year old son. My daughter is autistic but she is extremely affectionate and is attached to my hip 24/7, my youngest is 50/50 with me and mom, but my middle child seems to be at odds with me all the time. He has ADHD and is in a boundary pushing phase of life. Everything I ask or say is immediately met with "No" or worse, growling. And I feel as”

“I have a 6yr old and 4 yr old; they are close in age, but developmentally at very different places. We are close friends with some parents of our 6 year old, so there are lots of instances where it’s two or three six year olds and our 4 year old. This dynamic is nothing new for the kids, they’ve all been hanging out with each other since our youngest was born. What I find interesting is the forced forgiveness expectation some parents have- in this instance of their kids forgiving my youngest- si”

“what am I doing wrong? im traveling visiting my parents with my kids now. hes a monster for bedtime and wont get into bed andfree being so well mannered and cooperative for her while i was out for a one on one day with my daughter. tonight he was so loud just screaming crying hitting (definitely overtired ) and she would come close the door says my the screaming was disturbing my dad . then told my son to apologize for all the screaming because it bothered my dad. my mom told my son. it to do it”

“Hi all, first time seeking parenting advice online so please forgive me if something isn't clear. I have 3 boys ages 4, 2, and 5 months and lately I've noticed I have no patience with them. Not so much the baby and the 2yo but mainly the oldest he whines and cries about everything to the point where as soon as he starts I'm just seeing red. And then once he gets going the 2yo usually starts too. I'm convinced he thinks that if he makes enough of a fuss he'll get whatever it i”

“G'day dads (and lurking mums!), Dad of two here (3yo and 10mo). One thing I have struggled with most of my life is regulating my emotions, especially when it comes to frustration and anger. Since becoming a father, this has been exacerbated. I want to say that I never yell, or worse, with my family, but they feel it. The best way for me to describe how my feeling escalate is like traffic lights with no yellow light. Im green then in quick succession will hit red with my emotions. Ive recentl”

“I understand that children behave differently with different people but it's so incredibly exhausting that my 13mo does not sit down for longer than ca. 15s when he's with me. He's completely fine with his dad - he cruises around, walks between him and the furniture, sits and plays. He never does that with me. He just wants me to hold his hand and walk. Non-stop unless he's asleep. Firstly, I would like to understand why. What could be the reason for this difference in behaviour?”

“Curious how others are approaching decisions such as: discipline techniques, screen time, sugar, meals, etc. how do you align, especially when one parent cares about something more than the other? How do you get on the same page, or agree on an approach about how situations should be handled? and then keeping the consistency when the other parent isn’t around? I’m really struggling with my wife in having conversations where I think we are aligned and then her overriding that decision in the mome”

“I'm a doer, I don't like sitting around. When I'm home for the weekend or home after work, there's always stuff I can be doing. With three kids (5, 3 and 9 months) I will try to include them in things I'm doing so I can do stuff with them but will usually get frustrated that they're in the way. When I'm not doing by something and trying to focus on them, I end up focusing in on what theyre doing wrong and try to correct and teach, but will ultimately get frustrated. I”

“My 6yo son has always seemed to have low impulse control, especially when he is excited. Struggling with emotional regulation is something that has also persisted for him. I’m trying to figure out whether this falls within the range of typical development or if it’s something we should be looking into further. It seems like he struggles with this much more than his peers at this point. He’s always been a silly and affectionate kid who loves to move. When he gets really excited, silly, or upset,”

“I have two kids ages 13 and 7 months. Time wasn’t on my side with kids so it is what it is. I feel like I am running out of patience for just daily tasks. First off, I am so fatigued that it feels worse than normal tired. My head hurts everyday in a “hungover” feeling way, by the end of the day my head always hurts and I feel tense and angry almost. My baby is a good sleeper, but it’s still a lot of work. I also don’t sleep well at all because all night I anticipate him waking up. My 13 year old”

“Hi all, would love some advice here. My son is turning 4 in September and I’m having a really hard time getting him to obey basic things. Today we went on a hike with his cousins. He went with his aunt/my sister for a bit and his older cousins while I stayed with the baby and a few minutes later my sister returned with him to put him in time out. He had picked up a rock, my sister told him not to throw it, and he threw it at his cousin’s face. We had a talk after a brief timeout and I explained”

“I’m a firefighter, so I’m away from home every third day for 24 hours at a time. When myself and mom are at home with the girls (ages 6 and 4) they typically behave, somewhat. As with most kids I get the impression it’s not uncommon to struggle getting them to listen and behave, but it’s mostly manageable. But when I’m away at work, the girls are uncontrollable and my wife has the hardest time with them. Like way out of control. They don’t respond to anything she says or does. The difference in”

“I'm really not sure what to do with my 5 1/2 year old daughter as far as discipline goes. Her older sister does not fight me the way she does. Part of it I think is my fault. From ages 2-4 she would cry a lot over things not going her way and I would try and make her feel better and hug her. Now I think she knows crying gets her attention. We were at the store today getting groceries with her dad and sister and she asked for an Olipop flavor that had caffeine in it. I told her no, it has caf”

“Hi dads and lurking moms. I have an issue with my nearly 8yo daughters attitude towards my girlfriend of 19 years (her mother). My GF used to works 4 days a week (a consensual choice) and has been on medical leave (burn out) since may and will be at least until august. According to me she should have been since at least april but she tried thoughing it out so she got pretty bad. I, on the other end, own 2 business and work usually between 50 and 65 hours a week and right now we are dealing with”

“3 kids. Eldest is 10 and demand resistant-high emotion child who struggles with emotional control. We are working with her to recognize, regulate and adjust but man we are on eggshells waiting to find out which version shows up in the morning , after school etc. if it’s a rough day then it’s a multi hour tantrum or bad mood. Other two are also high emotion kids, but to a much lesser extent. We are exhausted and burnt out. Both work full time and managing just doing my job at work has been not gr”

“Having some trouble with my 6 year old daughter. The attitude and back talk is so draining and we are so over it. If shes not rolling her eyes or growling, shes yelling and telling me no to anything I ask of her. I have tried consequences like a chore she doesnt like, ive tried quiet time in her room, I've taken away tv and video games. Nothing works submitted by /u/Ok_Union239 [link] [comments]”

“All hell breaks loose for my daughter- screaming, peeing on her car seat, lengthy tantrums at home if she happens to fall asleep. I have tried every strategy to make it easy- snacks things to do. But her meltdowns always correlate with when I pick her up. The boys aren’t happy either- I feel so guilty when I do not even work full time like some parents and try to get them before 3-4 if possible. In addition, my son always complains that his father isn’t picking him up- my husband works an hour a”

“I have a 2 year old son and lately I’ve been really hard myself for my parenting… I don’t want to be a permissive parent but I find it hard to not give in when we get such a limited amount of time together. For example, he’s not very good at independent play at home (daycare is a different story) and can be very clingy to me, which I allow. We do watch some TV shows together and lately he’s been asking for more TV. He wants juice everyday even though I said we were going to be a water only famil”

“I’m looking for some perspective on a playdate situation I’ve been dealing with. I’m very good friends with another mom who has a daughter a few months younger than my 4 yr old. The girls have always played together well enough, but over the past several hangouts, I’ve started seeing a pattern with her daughter now that she’s in full threenager mode. When the girls play, the other child will scream at the top of her lungs if my daughter is holding something she wants. She will snatch toys direct”

“How do people navigate overly affectionate/chaotic older siblings with a smaller one? I have a 6 year old and a one year old, and the one year old is very independent, will be content playing on his own for an hour with no interruption. Our 6 year old on the other hand is constantly running high energy, we are constantly reminding him to slow down/not throw himself around the house, jump over the baby, pick up the baby, yell in his ear, be literally 1/4 inch away from his face all of the time et”

“I'm possibly the most uptight person alive, but my husband is extremely chill about everything. I keep seeing online that if you want your kids to be relaxed and outgoing you yourself have to be a chill person. I guess the idea is that if you're super anxious it rubs off on your baby and makes them anxious submitted by /u/Suspicious_Box_4898 [link] [comments]”

“I'm possibly the most uptight person alive, but my husband is extremely chill about everything. I keep seeing online that if you want your kids to be relaxed and outgoing you yourself have to be a chill person. I guess the idea is that if you're super anxious it rubs off on your baby and makes them anxious submitted by /u/Suspicious_Box_4898 [link] [comments]”

“I’ve always wanted kids and now I have two - stepson 6 and daughter c. 2. Mother and I work full time, both senior managers with relatively demanding jobs but generally stick to 9-5, commute is short, school run close, hybrid etc so not too much in the way of practical stresses 6yr old has speech issues and increasingly, behavioural issues. 2yr old is, well, 2. Defiant, fearless, cheeky. They’re both wonderful at their best and i absolutely adore them. However, I find myself incredibly impatient”

“We have 4 year old and 5 month old girls. Our 4 year old is really struggling with the lack of attention. She loves being a big sister and is generally really good with the baby. She just wants constant attention. I was hoping she would get accustomed to the new normal a bit but she just seems to be getting worse. I feel like I’m constantly telling her off because it’s just so relentless. We do plenty of fun things with her it’s just that any time we need to do any cooking or cleaning or tend to”

“I’m not even sure how to word this without sounding ungrateful and like this is truly a first world problem. But I get so frustrated sometimes with how involved my parents want to be in my children’s lives. I’m a SAHM mom and my mom does help me by watching my son a few hours a week so that I can rest while my baby naps. And that is truly helpful but my dad works and he needs to see my kids on weekends and it feels like they need to see them every weekend or there are complaints. It’s just this”

“I became a mom a few years ago, and I genuinely wouldn't change it for the world. My kids are the best part of my life, and I love watching them grow. But lately I've realized that somewhere along the way, I stopped feeling like... me. Every day revolves around school runs, meals, laundry, cleaning, appointments, bedtime routines, and making sure everyone else is okay. By the time the house is finally quiet, I'm so exhausted that I usually just scroll on my phone for a while before g”