Divorced Parents Make the Wedding Guest List a Minefield

“My fiance had his best man, great. Then said he'd rather be a guest, ok no problem. Then he said actually I might have to house-sit that day... Ok, do what you have to do. Then he said actually I'll make it. Great! Then he said he might not make it due to car issues. No problem man, another friend offered to pick him up. Cool, said he'll definitely be there then. We put a seat for him at the groomsmen table so he'll be with his buddies. 11 days before the wedding, - actually I ca”

“Some back story, my fiancée (35 male) is the eldest son of 2 and when we were looking at venues for minimonies his parents saw they offered bigger packages and talked him into doing a big ceremony as they would send us money to help. We agreed and we’ve been planning our wedding, well it’s coming up and his bother (29m) says that even though he hadn’t done anything or gone to the gym that his back is hurting to the point where he can’t walk. Some back story here is that his brother has been a bo”

“Sooo, we are in the very beginning stages of planning our wedding. My fiancé (30m) has so many close male friends that I assume he will choose to be groomsmen. I (32f) really don't have many close girlfriends. I am friends with all of his guy friends wives and girlfriends who I would choose no issue BUT they didn't choose me to be in their weddings. Would it be weird for me to ask them? I've known them all since high school too and we were close-ish back then and I moved away. They a”

“At the beginning of October my husband and I are in a wedding out of state. Thankfully my in laws are also coming/ invited to wedding, they will be helping us take care of our 3yo and 4mo. I’m having a lot of anxiety surrounding how I’m going to breastfeed/ be there for my baby while on a bridesmaid schedule. Baby still eats every 2 hours sometimes 3 if he’s distracted. I have about 4 or 5 frozen breast milk bags I’m going to bring with us. Does anyone else have experience with this? I exclusive”

“Here’s the situation: My family background: mom and dad divorced 20+ years ago after 20 years married. I don’t know the details but there’s a lot of hatred between the two. They haven’t been in the same city since my college graduation 15+ years ago and my dad required that I made sure he and my mom were never in the same room. I borrowed a table once from my dad to serve Easter dinner for my mom on. I didn’t tell him and when he found out he aggressively threw the table out of his car and left”

“I have a friend who I no longer really want to come to my wedding due to his behavior surrounding my brothers recent wedding, but don’t know how to handle the situation / bring it up to him. This friend and my brother have been friends for much longer than I have been friends with him, and I am mainly friends with him through my brother and other mutual. The past few years I have been a bit closer to him than my brother mainly because of geographical location of our other friends. He moved acros”

“As the title says, I'm getting married in less than a week and I don't know if my dad will be there (or if I want him there for that matter). A little bit of background, my dad has struggled with addiction most of my life and was at times very abusive to us siblings and especially my mom. He and my mom are still married but basically separated at this point. He lives in a different country most of the year and usually will come visit only when a big family event is happening (weddings, b”

“I am trying to put everyone in the "traditional" seating placements for the front row to avoid drama. My parents are separated and don't really get along. Where does the bride's mother and father typically sit during the ceremony for this situation? They both have new partners. Thank you! submitted by /u/D-Strider [link] [comments]”

“I have a really wonderful aunt and uncle, and I get along really well with one of their sons. The problem is that their two elder kids are not people I would really want at my wedding. I am biracial and one of them is 100% racist and I’m fairly sure wouldn’t want to come anyway. The other is nice but has batshit crazy views and a ton of chaotic kids. Additionally, neither of them invited me to their weddings. Would it be nuts to invite my aunt, uncle, and my cool cousin and not the others? I rea”

“I am currently helping my eldest daughter plan her wedding. She has never been close to her father (my ex-husband) and does not want him to walk her down the aisle. She really doesn't even want him there and is only inviting him to keep the peace with his side of the family. Originally she wanted my father to walk her down the aisle but unfortunately he passed away in 2020. So, instead she wants her brother (aka, her best friend) to walk her down the aisle. She also does not want a first dan”

“Hi everyone, My brother is getting married and as a family we wanted to do something special for him and my sister in law. Me and my brother are going to speech, but we wanted to do something creative with the 6 of us as well. Something that shows how much we care about them, but isn't 'cringy' or another speech. We already have a lot of photoalbums, so pictures of our childhood wouldn't be much of a surprise. I'd really appreciate it if you guys share ideas, share things oth”

“From the title alone, I think most people will say “yes” immediately, but hear me out. My fiance and I have been engaged for two years and our wedding is in a month and a half. At the time of making the guest list, both my and my fiancé’s younger brothers were single. Over a year ago we sat them both down and explained that if they had a committed partner by 6 months before our wedding, they could bring them because we are doing a large head table with our bridal party and their partners (most o”

“Hi everyone, I need help. To make a long story short we invited a couple to our wedding. They are the son and daughter in law of my fiancé’s family friends and we were in thier wedding as a bridesmaid and groomsmen. We are not very close with them though. We found out they are doing something we don’t approve of. I will not share since it could be identifying information.We found this out through someone who we are friends with. There is proof. The issue is that our friend who told us may be put”

“My wedding is FARRRR OUT so I’m asking now to have plenty of time to think. So my relationship has been rocky with him throughout my whole life. Not to get too much into it but we don’t really talk, only like 3-4 times a year and it’s like 1-2 texts. Honestly I don’t like him much, but I don’t hate him, yk? And I haven’t even actually SEEN him in a year, and before that it had been over a year. I plan on having my stepdad walk me down the aisle, considering we have a much closer relationship and”

“I'm 41 male. I have been a paraplegic since I was 22. I was the kid who never got to be a ringbearer or junior groomsman in weddings. However, i naively thought that in adulthood I would be asked to be a groosman in wedding. But my injury happened and i have never been asked to be in a wedding party whle all my friends have been in them. It hurts like hell, because it just reinforces he fact that I'm not good enough to be in anyone's wedding and I suspect that a lot of it has to do w”

“So I do have a good relationship with her parents. But I really don’t get along with their daughter. What is the best solution? submitted by /u/Apprehensive_Copy714 [link] [comments]”

“Hello, I’m writing this with a very broken heart. My partner and I are getting married in Colorado on August 22. We live in Ohio so technically a small destination wedding with 15 people. My parents have always had some money issues — mainly tied to being financially irresponsible. My brother and I have bailed them out the past couple years. My father threatened my fiancé that since he chose to propose to me in Florida without them in attendance, he demanded that both my parents were at the wedd”

“hi all, basically as the title states, my best friend has asked me to be a best woman for their upcoming wedding next year. Only there’s one problem… I’ve never been to a wedding before! 😅 I’m not really sure what’s expected of me in this role? I know that it’ll be a small wedding (ceremony in the registry office, reception after) but that’s about it - my friend hasn’t been much help either when I’ve asked! i’m a super anxious person & i’m scared i’m not gonna do my role properly, can anyon”

“Hey! Looking for some advice here. We get married March 2027 and my Grandmother on my Dads side has been very awkward. We originally had a venue (not confirmed) but discussed to be in my hometown which is about a 30 min drive/10 minute train in to the city centre of where our actual venue is (west end of Edinburgh) I was on the phone to my mum having a lighthearted conversation talking mother of the bride dresses and my grandmother walked in to the house at the time we were on the call. Fast for”

“My fiancé and I are planning our wedding and she has 6 or 7 friends that she's including as bridesmaids. On the other hand, my guy friends have dwindled over the year mainly because they moved away and due to Covid and health issues I never made new friends that I'm really close with. I have several female friends and I have/had a best friend who's still local but he and I have drifted a lot over the years and I'm considering not even including him as a groomsman. That would leav”

“Trying to decide between a big wedding (100+), big wedding party or a wedding with under 50 people and only a best man and MOH. For those who had big weddings, do you wish you would have kept it small. And for those who had small weddings, do you think you missed out on a bigger wedding? submitted by /u/Simple-Writer-3562 [link] [comments]”

“We are getting to the point where we are ready to finalize the order for the ceremony. I know we will have our maid of honor / best man closest to us, but what determines the rest? I have been to one wedding where it was by height, and another where it was clearly by brides favorite to least favorite (told to me by the bride. Luckily I was right after the MOH, so I wasn't too offended lol). I don't want to do the second option, and not really sure I understand the point of the first opti”

“Curious on people’s opinions/suggestions of mine and my fiancé’s plan and if anyone has done something similar. Groom + best man already at front (groom does not want a groom’s entrance) Processional song begins: 1. Groom’s mother & father are at entrance to aisle, groom walks up the aisle to escort his mother with his father following 2. MOH walks down the aisle (I do not have any other bridesmaids) 3. Bride’s mother + stepfather walk me down the aisle I liked this idea to make the processi”

“I’m getting married and we’ve decided on an immediate-family-only wedding. parents and siblings, no friends. It’s going to be a destination wedding. Honestly, the reason is that I don’t feel like I have close friendships anymore. I’m still in touch with some girls, but it’s more “check in every now and then” than anything deep, and they haven’t really been present or supportive throughout my relationship. So it felt right to keep it to immediate family only. Plus we’re both awkward introverts an”

“My fiancé and I have been together for 7 years and are getting married soon. I’m wondering if I’m being unreasonable here because I know it’s his brother, but I also don’t want someone standing up at our wedding who has openly disliked me for years. For some background, his family has never really been involved in my life. They didn’t even meet my family until we’d been engaged for about five months (over 6½ years into our relationship). When my mom passed away after we’d been dating for almost”

“I am wondering if anyone's immediate family likes their fiancé and seemed happy with the engagement but weren't happy when they heard about a wedding being organised? I don't want to write an essay explaining why I fell out with my parents this evening over this, I am just curious to hear if others had a similar experience. submitted by /u/ContestOrganic [link] [comments]”

“I posted a few days ago about my friends acting distant before my wedding , and then posted an update after reaching out to them about my hotel block and RSVP . Yesterday I was still feeling upset about everything, so I decided to message Vera privately outside of our group chat. I said something along the lines of, "Hey, I'm going to take it that you won't be coming to the wedding or staying at the hotel?" She responded pretty quickly and apologized for the late reply. She sai”

“Hi all. Trying to pick a Best Man and I'm having trouble because my two best choices live out-of-town atm and I don't know how soon before the wedding they'll be around. The Groomsmen though are in town. I don't feel like any of the Groomsmen are quite close enough to me to be Best Man instead: they're all newer friendships, and I do really want my brother or my best friend in that role. I could be convinced otherwise though. How do people handle this? I wouldn't care if”

“My fiancé’s parents are divorced and have been for years. Both have found new partners with his dad even getting remarried a few years ago. We are both very close with my fiancés mom and her partner and when planning the wedding, they are our priority and we want them to have the best time. The marriage ended badly with my fiancés dad leaving his mom for another woman in a very messy way, causing my fiancé and his sister to not speak to their dad for a few years, my fiancé and his dad started sp”

“I am south asian/indian and I feel like our weddings are a big money pit 😫. From multiple events to the groom arriving on horseback with drummers, music, etc. I’m curious if other cultures have their own things like this? Ty. ETA - Of course you don’t have to do anything but family expectations and wanting to adhere in the moment play into it. Then in retrospect it seems like a total waste of money 🙃. submitted by /u/dms2628 [link] [comments]”

“TLDR: I have the potential for a very large wedding party and fiancé doesn’t have one. Curious on opinions. ETA: since so many people are confused by the turnaround and I feel like it’ll be easier to put it here. We are only doing courthouse because we need a quick turnaround for benefit purposes. We would rather not skip the actual ceremony and reception fully as we do WANT to celebrate with everyone hence the “vow renewal” in less than 2 years. Also, only family will be present for the initial”