Screenwriters post scripts looking for structured draft feedback

“Inspired by heathers and mean girls Main characters name is Ronnie (Ronnette) Green. She’s the narrator. Made it nsfw just in case. Scared to share but how else will I get anywhere. Any other critiques would be welcome. I’ll try not to be too butt hurt about it lol ————————— Our school has a suicide problem. Which is unfortunate, because high school is supposed to be where you start building yourself into whoever you're going to be. Figuring out who sticks around and who you let go. That&#39”

“Logline: After the death of his best friend, an old-school cowboy teams up with a psychopathic android to take down the mega-corporation that turns its enemies into weird-ass zombies. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1D8HxIrrHgSECaMphfOmH2iE-4b_pjdt4/view?usp=sharing I’m mostly looking for general feedback, nothing in particular. Does the dialogue work? Do the mystery and the characters’ chemistry make you want to keep watching and see what happens next? Was there anything about the story that di”

“Here's one I just finished. It starts as a peaceful ensemble comedy/drama, then pitches into horror before going fully absurd. A group of aging pranksters reunite in the Paris catacombs when one of their group suddenly passes away. But the catacombs have changed, and revelations concerning the nature of his death fracture their friendships, and sanity. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MilVfc_MBN5_FitOSBQ-XsWWHzAg1u1m/view?usp=sharing submitted by /u/NeverShallDoHarmToMe [link] &#”

“Genre: Buddy Comedy Logline: Two goofball best buds need to do a job for their friend that was just arrested, unfortunately, it involves 20 grand, chicken tenders, and the cartel. Wrote this for a Proof of Concept competition that I will be making into a short film in the next few months. Just looking for some feedback on the dialogue and overall screenplay. This is only my 3rd screenplay I've written and never had my work proof read before. Thanks for your time. [ https://drive.google.com/f”

“Mooks (Part 1) (R-rated) This is something I began writing for someone almost 20 years ago, but for whatever reason I put it aside and basically forgot about it. A recent conversation has made me wonder if maybe it's worth another pass or twelve. This "Part 1" is much less than half the extant screenplay, but the other pieces are not sequential enough to stitch together without more work than I have time for right now. Maybe I'll take a shot at it sometime soon. Anyhoo, enjoy (”

“(Hi, curious on the pacing and prose of this short. Is it too over the top?) - Inside The Tuscan Grotto, a mid-tier Italian restaurant desperately trying to maintain a veneer of fine dining, Shift Manager Kevin corners three of his waitstaff near the swinging kitchen doors. In his hands, he balances a single, complimentary slice of heavily refrigerated tiramisu stabbed with a sparkler. "Listen up," Kevin whispers intensely, swiping a blotch of marinara sauce off his tie. "Table 43”

“Title: Bluebell Grove Format: Feature Pages: 93 Pages Genres: Horror/Comedy Draft Status: Second Draft Logline: A bored twenty-something reunites with his old college friends to claim a million-dollar bounty on a notorious serial killer, only for them to discover that surviving a real-life horror story is much harder than they imagined. Concerns I have: -It’s supposed to be a horror-comedy but I’ve gotten comments from friends that the main antagonist is too goofy and feels more like a sitcom ch”

“Okay, screenwriters. In your opinion, what is the maximum page length for a feature-length comedy? What number would be okay, and what number seems like too much? Please and thank you. submitted by /u/Dopingponging [link] [comments]”

“Title: The Cabin Format: Feature Page Length: 62 Genres: Horror Logline: When an atheist family stays in a cabin for the summer, the parents must confront religion in order to save their daughter before it's too late. Feedback Concerns: I just finished my script. I know it needs a lot of work. I am seeking help and feedback on lengthening the script as well as filling in any plot holes. Think if The Conjuring, Hereditary, and The Exorcist had a baby this would be my script. Disclaimer: There”

“Was hoping to get some feedback on this short film that I've been writing. Title: This Sucks Format: Short film Page Length: 15pgs Genre: Drama/Coming of Age Draft Status: 1st Draft Logline: After being told that she didn’t get into her dream school on the same day her father tells her that he’s getting married to someone half his age, a demoralized Venus must figure out what to do next with her life. Feedback Concerns: Mainly concerned if the story feels rushed or if it drags, along with th”

“Title: The Auloniad Format: Feature Page Length: 5 Genre: Horror Logline: Digital nomads and natives battle for sovereignty of a Greek Island Feedback Concerns: How impactful? Easy enough to read? Does it flow? Any advice appreciated. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1jMuvbGoqtYZZuV1kCwjUAiWQOwRnCV2x/view?usp=sharing submitted by /u/TheSprained [link] [comments]”

“Title: Stoned Pets Format: Animated feature Genre: Comedy Page length: 49 (48 if you exclude the title page) Logline: After a group of pets gain intelligence from accidentally consuming their owner's weed, a female Golden Retriever must convince the others to help rescue their owner from becoming the pet of a drug lord hippopotamus. Feedback concerns: I'm worried 48 pages may be a little too short for a feature film, so I'm hoping people will suggest additions to the story to pad out”

“I mean absolutely tear it apart. 19 Pages. Logline: "After a homemade party game unleashes an ancient blood pact, six friends embrace the game’s impact on the real world as they discover the curse that started it all." Riff & Ruin submitted by /u/davisbergstrom [link] [comments]”

“Title: Quick Fixes Format: Short Page Length: 6 so far Genre: Comedy Logline: After their end-of-term project goes missing, four bitter barely-still-friends are forced to collaborate one last time as they try to recreate it by morning. Feedback Concerns: This is the first part of a 30-page short I’m shooting with some friends, so please nothing relating to this in a spec-oriented way; the only people this script needs to work for are myself and the actors. Mainly curious about the comedy, first”

“Title: Admission Format: Feature Page Length: 5 Genre: Comedy drama Logline: Four families wage war to get their kids into an exclusive school Feedback Concerns: Too much chat? Sufficient clarity? Needs more description or clear enough? Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Hh596HpqrT13xTjNgiFXeEHz_mYCf-AP/view?usp=sharing submitted by /u/TheSprained [link] [comments]”

“Title: New Hair Format: Short Page Length: 10 Genre: Comedy drama Logline: After Gabriel wakes up with a hair in his mouth, shit goes south. Feedback Concerns: Can you think of a better ending?! Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1onJ7w8sCG1g6AndWFqht0guI8aKbUxa2/view?usp=sharing submitted by /u/TheSprained [link] [comments]”

“Hi all! This is the first script I've fully ever written, looking for feedback. Title: My Friend, Clarence Genre: Psychological horror / Cosmic horror Pages: 35 Description: An older sister taking his younger brother to a remote mountain lodge for a quiet weekend away. As the trip unfolds, small moments of unease begin piling up, making it harder to separate childhood imagination from reality. Joey, the little brother, manifests a being into reality that acts as his 'imaginary friend&#39”

“Title: Letters Format: Lean Feature Page Length: 30 Pages Genres: Drama Logline: When a quiet science student’s anonymous love letters spark rivalry and betrayal, she must choose between being seen by others or finally seeing herself. Feedback Concerns: Anita’s Arc: In a lean 30-page format, does her transition from a quiet observer to someone forced to "see herself" feel organic, or does the pacing feel rushed? Anita/Bianca Dynamic: Are the stakes between them clear and the rivalry ea”

“Title: “The Summer I was Not Okay With the Thirteen Strange Things It was doing to my Pretty Little Yellow Jacket”. Genre: Comedy Spoof mocking numerous Teen Dramas, particularly I’m Not Okay With This, Stranger Things and Euphoria. Pages: 49 Logline: “Bethany Yesvak is an ordinary cynical teenager whose life is turned upside down when she discovers she has telekinetic powers. As she struggles to keep her abilities a secret, she must also survive the everyday chaos of high school, family, and gr”

“I want some tips on adding humour to the story through scenes, dialogues, etc. You can share some analysis too from any movie/book you've read or seen through. submitted by /u/Internal_Novel7473 [link] [comments]”

“TITLE: BRAINROT FORMAT: Feature PAGE LENGTH: 103 Pages GENRE: Comedy LOGLINE: When a viral new app triggers a literal brainrot apocalypse, four teenage friends hit the road to kill the app and save the world. FEEDBACK CONCERNS: I understand that reading a full feature is a lot to ask, but I would really appreciate some insight on the opening 10 pages. Any suggestions for ways I can really punch up the joke count from the get go in the first few pages? All feedback will be gratefully appreciated.”

“I don’t even know how I’m supposed to garner a following or give anyone a reason to invest what I’m working on without a strong reason. Sure I can shoot my own stuff but I’m just gonna ring my wallet dry and not be satisfied with the work on a low budget. Do I go the curry barker route and do sketch comedy online first? 😅 submitted by /u/Lost-Building-3701 [link] [comments]”

“Title: Astraeus Rising Feature Screenplay Page Count: 87 Genre: Sci Fi/Horror Logline: A rancher helps his late father-in-law's research partners test the prototype for their revolutionary particle accelerator on his land, but must fight for survival when it rips a chunk of dark matter from another dimension that bends the laws of physics and slowly drives them mad. DropBox Link GoogleDrive Link After writing daily for about 2 years, I recently finished my 4th feature screenplay. The cycle o”